For those unfamiliar with the genre, the Weird War genre is basically taking a historical war (in this case, WWII) and adding in fantastical or science-fiction elements (If you've watched Indiana Jones, read The Rocketeer, or played either Bloodrayne or Wolfenstein, basically that.)
1) A Jewish deathcamp prisoner attempts to make a golem to kill the Nazis and free his fellow prisoners. However due to unknowingly using clay that was infused with human ashes from the camp's furnace, the negative emotions corrupted the rituals and created a corpse gatherer instead.
2) A batch of dragon eggs is found in Wales. The British military already has plans on using the dragons as weapons against the Axis forces. Potential plot twist is the a Nazi spy has infiltrated the military and is planning on stealing the eggs.
3) The detonation of Trinity results in opening up a portal to another world (Biblical Hell, The Far Realms, or even the Forgotten Realms are all good choices).
4) The US military start fielding weapons that were reversed engineered from wreckage from a UFO crash in Roswell (I know the crash happened two years after the war ended, but work with me here.)
5) Nazi zombies... 'nuff said.
6) A allied soldier is struck by a bullet that lodges in his body. Shortly afterwords he begins hearing a voice in his head. The voice claims to be the bullet and it seems to know things that the soldier cannot of possibly known himself. u/PureLoop
7) A World War I battle is replayed by the ghosts of the dead that participated it, in the middle of a World War II battlefield, causing chaos and confusion among the living. u/PureLoop
8) A single time traveling soldier from after the war returns to prevent the loss of the Allied nations by assassinating Allied leaders. u/PureLoop
9) A poltergeist of unknown origins causes the deliberate misfiring of guns within the confines of rubble that used to be their school. u/PureLoop
10) In order to combat the recently developed biological weapon that is Nazi Zombies, American soldiers become unwitting test subjects of Lycanthropy. u/PureLoop
11) A meteor strikes the heart of a battlefield, causing an enormous explosion. From the crater countless bug like creatures swarm out and attack all living beings near by. Allied and Axis soldiers are forced into a cease fire to defeat the alien foe. u/PureLoop
12) A batch of bad rations cause nightmarish hallucinations for those that ate it. It soon becomes clear the that hallucinations were actually warped premonitions of the eaters fate in the war. u/PureLoop
13) Nazi scientist develop a cannon that ruptures the bonds that hold a soul in place. Unleashing it in battle they destroy an entire allied platoon in one shot, only to be violently torn apart by the vengeful souls. u/PureLoop
14) A decapitated head that appears to be still talking is found in the battlefield. When wind is passed over it's vocal cords it shouts a string of obscenities about Nazi scum and that it will take more than a tank to stop him. Unless the head is destroyed, the soldier remains alive. u/PureLoop
15) Death being overburdened by the war recruits a recently deceased soldier to act as his aid and help him gather the souls from the bodies. The soldier learns that if he does not lift the soul from the body of the mortally injured, they remain alive and in terrible suffering, and thus must choose who among his battalion he has to kill out of mercy. u/PureLoop
16) A Chaplin is the soul survivor of a battle between forces in a small french village. He speaks of a rapture by God who came down and smote all who participated in the heinous war. It comes to light that several of the dead at the battlefield were struck with tremendous force, and have bite marks on their bodies. Eventually it's discovered that the Chaplin was a vampire, though were he is now, no one knows. u/PureLoop
17) Nazi aquatic tanks and APV's suddenly appear on the beaches of Delaware, ushering and new front on the American coast. u/PureLoop
18) Two islands with separate operations occurring on them in the Pacific front begin moving towards one another before colliding. Both islands turn out to be massive sea creatures that then attack one another, utter destroying the armies above them. u/PureLoop
19) In Paris, several off-duty Nazi officers, drunk off of cheap wine, end up getting lost in the catacombs. They inadvertently destroy a shrine or glyphs, resulting in releasing several hundred angry spirits.
20) During the Battle of Hürtgen Forest, several American GIs and German stormtroopers end up becoming the target of a Wild Hunt.
21) A time-traveler, attempting to assassinate Hitler, is captured, and his technology is reverse-engineered to aid the German war effort.
22) The golem of Prague, left dormant until it was needed, is reawakened. u/I_walked_east
23) The head of Bran is buried under the Tower of London and protects England from invasion. The power of the head scuttled the Spanish Armada. Now Nazis plan to steal it in preparation for their invasion. u/I_walked_east
24) The ghosts of victims of Unit 731 are hunted by a sadistic band of exorcists. u/I_walked_east
25) The Spanish fascists find Durandal, the sword of Roland, that has the power to cut mountains. u/I_walked_east
26) The Nazis have captured Baba Yaga, who has been helping the Russian all woman 588th night bombers (aka The Night Witches) repel the German Invasion. u/I_walked_east
27) In the woods surrounding Los Angeles Nazi sympathizers know as the Grey Shirts perform dark rituals at a secret compound. u/I_walked_east
28) At the American naval base on Midway, Private Second Class Leeroy Beck’s last sight as he bleeds out through his slit throat is a Japanese soldier morphing into an exact copy of him, trying to hide a large fox tail within a duffel bag. u/Pretzelbomber
29) Charles de Gaulle was actually a necromancer the entire time, and manages to stall the Germans using the wandering souls of the catacombs. u/OctoyeetTraveler
30) In the face of invasion, occupation, and possible annihilation at the hands of the invading German forces, the elders of a Russian village send their bravest into the forest to meet with the fae folk to make a deal. Will the village be willing or able to pay the price for protection against the Nazis?
31) A Soviet submarine accidentally opens an underwater portal to the Elemental Plane of Water during a nuclear test. The crew must find a way to seal the portal and deal with the creatures that initially made it through. u/JollyGreenStone
32) Elves are found in the Black Forest. The Nazis conspire with the Elves: if the Elves can push back the Russians on the Eastern Front, they'll receive Ukraine and Belarus as a new sanctuary. The Elves agree because they see all humans as inferior and they believe after defeating Stalin they can defeat Hitler. u/JollyGreenStone
33) A mad Nazi doctor in a concentration camp creates lycanthrope soldiers who transform, kill the staff, and take over the village. Invading Allied forces have to save the camp's prisoners from the feral lycanthropes. u/JollyGreenStone
34) On both the Allied and Axis sides, soldiers find themselves unable to die. Made immortal by some strange force which causes them to cling onto death (despite suffering grievous injuries which refuse to heal) all they can do is keep on fighting. Both sides must investigate the cause behind this lest the war never end and devolve into pure, mindless slaughter. u/Sobek6
35) Midway through the war and despite previous reports, the German forces have suddenly gained an advantage. Using new weaponry and possessing new successful approaches to warfare they look set to be unbeatable. It turns out that Germany has finally cracked communications across dimensions and Hitler is receiving advice from alternate versions of himself. (Perhaps there’s room for a version of Hitler that never became the monster history remembers him as to become a potential ally?) u/Sobek6
36) In the Pacific Theater, planes on both sides have been suffering malfunctions on a near regular basis, with both sides accusing each other of sabotage. The malfunctions began after a battle on an unnamed island which ended up destroying a small shrine. Are the malfunctions truly the work of sabotage? Is it gremlins doing what gremlins do best? Or have the island spirits been angered by the desecration of the shrine?
37) The Nazis' occult sciences division have been designing an engine that can run off the souls of the deceased. An Allied spy has been attempting to stall development, but has been reporting that the soul engine is almost ready for deployment in the Russian front. A team must be sent in to extract the spy and either retrieve or destroy the blueprints and the prototype engine. u/Th3R3493r
38) In response to the Polish resistance weaponizing golems with help from kabbalists, the Nazis have been attempting to mass-produce their own golems. So far efforts have been stymied by uncooperative Jewish prisoners, who often sabotage the golems by either making them fragile or programming them to attack their masters whenever they hear German, and the Third Reich's distrusts of "Juden Witchcraft". u/Th3R3493r
39) Due the Japanese's ill-treatment of the Chinese dead in Manchuria, Qui Shen (Chinese wraiths) have been rising in droves and attacking the invading Japanese soldiers. The attacks were originally random, lately they seem to be directed in such a way to be as damaging as possible. Either an exceptionally powerful Qui Shen is leading the attacks, or a powerful fangshi (type of Chinese wizard) has gain control of the undead. u/Th3R3493r
40) Oni are operating as mercenaries in the Pacific theater, selling their services to the highest bidder (typically whoever can offer the best alcohol and the prettiest girls). u/Th3R3493r
41) Having perfected a powerful and easily portable shielding spell, Axis paratroopers are now dropped without parachutes. Holy_Hand_Grenadier
42) Hitler's invasion of England is under way, and the Royal Family has been captured or assassinated. In the country's darkest hour, King Arthur returns, wielding Excalibur. Holy_Hand_Grenadier
43) The UK discovers that the Loch Ness monster is really a plesiosaur and that the bottom of the Loch contains a portal to an alternate Earth ... where dinosaurs still roam. Can the British expedition recover enough resources from this resource rich world to aid the war effort? PutridMeatPuppet
44) The nazi's have perfected an Aryan ritual, thinking it will allow them control over destiny. It instead unleashes an avatar of the demiurge who is rampaging across both frontlines. stamau123
45) Almost an entire batallion of captured Enemy Prisoners of War all spontaneously go catatonic, and then collectively, robotically, begin reciting biblical passages in Olmec, backwards for 3 hours, and 3 minutes every 27 hours and 27 minutes. Every prisoner repeats a different selection of passages and refuses to eat or drink, returning to a catatonic state between cycles. When sedated, additional prisoners fall catatonic and begin chanting where the others left off... those that die continue to move, unless cremated, at which point a new prisoner joins the chorus. MaxSizeIs
46) The metal inside every shell, shell casing, and bullet in Easy Company's ammunition train spontaneously liquified, pooling at the bottom of the containers. The explosives inside were undisturbed. The logistics crew tasked with guarding the train were all struck with dissociative hysterical blindness. MaxSizeIs
47) The local sex workers in the villages nearest the front speak of "La Dame sans merci" wearing a shimmering gown of purest black silk and with a touch capable of freezing a man to death instantly. There have been nine corpsman found dead from an unknown cause within the last 27 days, locally. The sex workers claim it to be her work. MaxSizeIs
48) Our soldiers report sightings of spectral cavalry riding ghost horses during the last battle. The knights wore feathered wings upon thier back. They wiped out all but one member of three platoons, who report as witness. The witness beleives the men were all slashed to death with swords and spears. Autopsy supports this statement. MaxSizeIs
49) An Allied Radio Operator for the 589th Field Artillery Battallion reports receiving requests for artillery strikes calling for a fire mission directly on the calling unit's position a full 24 hours before said unit had actually arrived in the combat zone. The radio-man and a second operator on duty reported details of the battle they heard accurately, before the events actually occured. MaxSizeIs
50) Bomber crews report sightings of unlit and unflagged "Black Bombers" joining thier formation shortly before bombs are dropped, sometimes doubling thier numbers in formation. Missions where such sightings have occured have a 56% higher loss rate than those without these sightings. MaxSizeIs
51) After several hours of listening for enemy radio activity during bouts of heightened ionospheric activty, a handful of Radio Operators develop obsessive compulsions to scrawl out the strangely shaped Hexagramatic runes contained within several Elder Signs. The operators continue to repeat the glyphs until thier fingertips wear off to bloody stumps. MaxSizeIs
52) Eighteen enemy soldiers fall ill and die after desecrating a shrine to an obscure saint in a tiny church a few miles behind the front-lines. A special forces unit of crack troops crossed the lines to help meet and retrieve what they found, only to report the incident. Three of those soldiers found dead were our boys under-cover or were double agents. Just what did they uncover? MaxSizeIs
53) The boffins coming out of SRI in Menlo Park (known in certain circles for powerful 'psychotronic research') have requested OSS (the precursor to the CIA) support for something they're calling Operation MOON WICKET. OSS explains, they need a platoon of soldiers near the front-lines to sit inside a dark water tank for days on end under specific conditions outlined in the mission parameters and to be strictly adhered to! (The common soldiers are to report on thier psychic experiences, despite up until now, never having heard the words: 'psychotronic research') It is critical that the unit's position not be discovered until after the operation has been completed, after which an elaborate counter-intelligence ruse will be perpetrated to obscure any hint of the research-site. The soldiers are told that this is to be their R&R, but the rules are stricter than normal, and punishments for breaking these rules are severe. (Not much of a R&R, if you ask the soldiers, and as the enemy draws closer, internal tension are high.) The OSS spooks, on the other hand, have been told that should the research not be completed before the enemy locates and overruns the village, that the enemy must not be allowed to take any prisoners, alive or dead; whatever the "or dead" part means, the spooks aren't sure. (The pressure is getting to them, which one will crack first?) MaxSizeIs
54) Under orders from the OSS Black branch, upon retaking of the city by US 5th Army Infantry forces, available units must clear out Nazi holdouts in the sewers beneath the Temple of the Magna Mater in Rome, and secure the contents of the temple at all costs; but instead find an infestation of Ghouls, some in SS uniform and armed with automatic weaponry, and seem to be able to dissapear in the blink of an eye. Unfortunately the temple was already looted by the Nazi Karotechia. The contents of the temple could no doubt give the Nazis tools to turn the tide, (should thier occult research be as advanced as the Allies) and possibly allow them to retake much of the ground lost since D-Day. It is imperative that the contents of the temple prior to the Nazi looting be verified in order to gain an understanding of Nazi capabilities. MaxSizeIs
55) According to your most recent orders, Allied Army Airforce planes carrying vital one of a kind equipment, and research personell to support General Chiang Kai-shek in the Chinese Theater's War Effort, crashed somewhere over "The Hump" (The Eastern Himilayas) due to enemy air patrols that shouldn't have been there, according to intellegence. A brief radio message has gotten through, confirming the safety of the pilots; you have been tasked with establishing a hasty expedition to retrieve them and the "package". It is the depths of winter, prey that you and your men do not encounter the dreaded Yeti, or the armed occult forces protecting the secrets of Hidden Shangrala and Kublai Kahn's Pleasure Domes from outsiders; both secret and unknowable threats to a Westerner. MaxSizeIs
56) Dr Moreau's research has been wholeheartedly adopted by the Soviets, creating an entire Regiment of Hybrid Ape-men shock-troops, with Never-Before-Seen Heavy Mechanized-Infantry Weapon systems of a design more advanced than even Axis or Allied Scientists could devise. The truth is, these forces arrived from an alternate future; stop the inciting event from forming a closed-timeloop, and the never-ending fountain of Ape-troops and Super-Science Materiel might stop, and prevent a Future Soviet Union from winning the Cold War (even now a Distant Nightmare Vision in the minds of Allied Oneiromancers; worse even than an Axis victory!) MaxSizeIs
57) Something is destroying Japanese submarines in the pacific at a frightening pace. American warships, equipped with a new sonar technology, have detected an enormous signal that appears to be biological in nature. The size and speed have caused the scientists to speculate about the old stories of giant squids or kraken. PutridMeatPuppet
58) In 1930, Albert Einstein discovers that he is the second reincarnation of Isaac Newton, after a chance encounter with a Romani spiritualist and in the process discovered that Gauss was the first. Guided by his former life's work with Alchemy, he develops the theory on the General Equivalence of Energy Exchange and Matter Creation and launched the search for a rigorous understandings of the underpinnings of High Energy Magicks. In his research, in 1933 Weimar Germany, he is contacted by a war-weary version of his future self, who convinces him he must defect to the United States to avoid a horrific fate. The OSS Black Branch has tasked you, a local operative undercover in Europe to extract Einstein and see him safely to the States; except the current year is 1945; The Black Branch has cryptically warned you that Einstein has been killed sixteen times over numerous timelines, and that it is imperative that he remain unharmed in this one... will the reality of the multiverse tear your sanity apart? MaxSizeIs
59) At sundown on the autumn equinox, 1940; a plucky 20-something female Home Guard volunteer, who up-until-now had not revealed that she was a Witch, managed to hold off a scouting party of at least one Company of German forces in the early days of Unternehmen Seelöwe (Operation Sea Lion), outside the small coastal village of Pepperinge-Eye near Dorsetshire. Her defense bought the small village time to evacuate, (unsupported due to a massive, coordinated assault across the Southern Coast of England by the invading Germans, leading to a general evacuation known as Operation Dynamo II) and for three days and nights engaged the enemy long enough for scattered elements of VII Corps and the 70th Independent Infantry Brigade to arrive. Should the undermanned, undertrained, and under supported Guerilla forces of VII Corps, fail in their defense of the fighting retreat London could have been lost during the Siege. Instead, she (and as it later turned out, other members of the New Forest Coven) helped to bog down the Nazi advance all along their advancing front. Marylinn Myrddin Eglantine-Price was awarded Conspicuous Gallantry Medal for her actions in the battle called "Bedknob Hill". Witnesses report extensive wreckage consisting of household and kitchen items said to be "floating in the air on their own and holding Jerries prisoner, afraid for their lives", as well as dozens of flags and even one bullet-riddled suit of plate-armor! MaxSizeIs
60) An Australian Division has been capturing and training bunyips and releasing them in Asian Jungles for use against the Japanese. Allied forces are instructed to say 'lollipop lick liquor lover like Lillihammer' or anything with a lot of 'L's in it if you hear a bark that sounds like a dog mixed with a walrus as the Japanese forces who do not practice usually do not say 'L's correctly. They are stealthy as the grave and have been seen killing crocodiles with ease. Th3R3493r
61) The Nazi SS Occult research and development have made a "perfect" machine gunner. It is an abomination made of sewn flesh that can hold two hundred kilograms of bullets, two modified MG-42s, is armored to take a large quantity of small arms fire without losing momentum. It lacks a head but has three eyes in their aiming upper arms to aim each gun independently and two sets of arms to reload and fix the machine guns. Where they are getting the bodies are theorized to be one willing living subject and at least 3 undamaged dead bodies. They are questionable loyal to the units and are known to kill friend and foe alike who crosses their lines of fire. Th3R3493r
62) In the early days of the war, both the Germans and Allies made extreme advancements in Optics, driven perhaps by research into early radar prototypes. Progress was also fueled by the need to predict airstrikes before they occur, and the promises of early stage resarch into Applied Occult Prognostication, for both sides. By 1941, two independent programs, codenamed MÍMISBRUNNR and BARONSATURDAY, by the Germans and Allies respectively, were of sufficiently advanced stages as to be applied to the war effort directly. Independently, both sides had realized the importance of extensive pharmaceutical and surgical modification. Should the subject survive the chemical treatments, and surgery, of which denucleation was one important step, the resulting high rates of insanity and chemical dependency eventually led to a curtailment and confinement to asylum of members of both programs before the end of the war. A friend of yours has undergone this procedure, has foreseen the results, and begs you to help them escape their fate. MaxSizeIs
63) War is at a stalemate, both sides are looking for a way to open up new a new front. This brings them to the under dark where both sides try to sway the drow empress to join them. As the drow contemplate wheter to join one side or the other both british and german covert agents wage a shadow war even the drow can't see. AllSeeingCCTV
64) Early on in the war, Himmler and the Thule Society accidentally stumbled across a ritual which allowed them to open portals to other universes. Now the Nazis find their forces bolstered by fascist doppelgangers and malevolent/sympathetic alternative versions of members of the Allied Forces. Rumour has it Hitler himself often seeks audience with a council of versions of himself. Sobek6
65) The Allies begin formalization of a Magician Corps, from priests and rabbis who demonstrably and reliably performed miracles, to so-called "witch doctors", women accused of witchcraft, and American natives rumored to wield their own magic. Some of them don't really have anything truly mystical, while others find that their miracles and magics work so fundamentally different as to interfere with each others' workings. Meanwhile, the Thule Society under Nazi Germany has been regularly unearthing artifacts, which the leadership orders utilized in the war effort without attempting to properly understand each one, leading to mixed and unpredictable results. archDeaconstructor
66) A detachment of advanced Nazi submarines begins raiding the American coast, beaching under the surf and releasing nixes trained as amphibious soldiery. America has its own amphibious horrors as well, though- the Deep Ones, finding their hidden holdings threatened by this new battleground, begin their own off-the-books contributions to the war. archDeaconstructor
67) A shadowy wraith levitates the Shah of Iran and severs his head from his body in broad daylight, days before what would have been the invasion of Iran by Soviet and Allied forces. It is recognized as a kind of specter typically employed by British magicians, and so the full, if still outdated, military might of Iran mobilizes as quickly as it can. It is still crushed, but the Shah's supporters manage to lionize his legacy in the national eye as someone who would have created a more independent Iran up until his death at foreign hands. archDeaconstructor
68) Stregherian witches in both New England and Old Italy call upon their deities to nourish and poison, to send storms and fair weather, and to bring luck and fair fortune to the boys they send to the front lines. archDeaconstructor
69) In the chaos of battle, rifts in time release warriors from centuries past and future. In the Vienna Offensive, Mongols spill out onto the streets and further compound civilian casualties in the confusion. A lone jet fighter from the Pan-Pacific Union spontaneously appears over Japan with weapons white-hot, accidentally taking out two bombers from the Doolittle Raid with charged-particle weaponry before fatally crashing into a third, causing America to mistakenly believe Japan's air superiority and readiness even more powerful than they thought. Small numbers of Ottoman Janissaries are inexplicably found in Greecian cities, helping resist the Italian invasion and later dying to a man in Nazi occupation. archDeaconstructor
70) With British psi intelligence offices having cracked the Enigma code, Alan Turing is brought onto a long-term project few minds have the aptitude for- the development of automated soldiers that could end not only this war, but any war Britain would have to prosecute after. archDeaconstructor
71) Two black American infantry battalions are subjected to vampirism and lycanthropy, respectively, as an initial assessment of the effectiveness of each on logistical, tactical, and strategic levels. There's no way even a word of this can be leaked to anyone back home, though, so they're sent on only the most dangerous, far-reaching covert missions, becoming the bogeymen that every Axis soldier fears. archDeaconstructor
72) The dying Great Clans of Mars can wait no longer, and regrettably must colonize the Earth before the global life support railwork collapses and kills every last Martian. Long-distance radio signals are picked up from Mars, indicating in over thirty Earthling languages that the Martians will offer full military support to whichever faction of primitives can guarantee the most land to the Great Clans. archDeaconstructor
73) Rumor starts spreading about the "seven for one deal"; if you find a pistol magazine with bizarre symbols and untranslatable words on it, load seven rounds, and insert it in your pistol, each of those seven rounds will strike true if it is any way physically possible for them to do so. But after the 7th round is fired, fatal calamity instantly befalls the shooter. Vote_for_Knife_Party
74) Good news: the Army isn't putting saltpeter in the rations to dull your libido. Bad news: they're putting experimental mood adjusters in the rations to get you to associate violence with pleasure, and the squad machine gunner keeps giving you this look while he cleans his weapon... Vote_for_Knife_Party
75) There are no atheists in foxholes, but there sure are a lot of accidental devil worshippers. Demons are having a field day going from fighting hole to fighting hole, ready to cut a deal for survival. Sure, you'll survive the battle, but in the heat of the moment did you think to specify how long? Vote_for_Knife_Party
76) In the highlands of SE Asia, Japanese troops have forced Chinese and British troops to fall back. But something that lives in those mountain passes of the SE Himalayas is mauling the Japanese soldiers at night ... and locals are mentioning the term “Yeti”. PutridMeatPuppet
77) Theories of a Hollow Earth are partially true. Although the Earth is not truly hollow, its more like Swiss cheese with tunnels traveling deep underground and undersea ... and it opens up a new front in the war as both sides scramble to explore these tunnels and move troops thru the core of the Earth to strike at their enemies on the surface. Things take a turn for the weird when both sides encounter species native to these underground travel routes... PutridMeatPuppet
78) An increasingly paranoid Joseph Stalin seeks to recreate the rituals of Koschei the Deathless and become immortal. He has begun to harrase the tribal peoples of Siberea in an attempt to force the secret from them. Patchwork18
79) First contact has been made, and the aliens want... Entertainment? Turns out that they view war as a spectator sport, and start giving out advanced technology to the armies that amuse them the most. Do you try and win their favour? Or perhaps someone should stop them before the war becomes the apocalypse! deadgaiko
80) One day, without warning, every projectile weapon on the planet ceases to function. Guns jam, bombs explode before deployment, even bow strings instantly snap! Chaos ensues as battlefield tactics are forced to adapt. Weeks later, delayed intelligence reaches both sides: The neutral state of Vatican City have discovered a powerful artifact with reality-bending powers... deadgaiko
81) Fiji mermaids are real. They're a boogeyman while out in the Pacific, feeding off those sleeping. The Axis powers are really interested in capturing one alive: They're venom is known to have strange hallucinogenic properties. Thepipe90
82) There is rumors of a circus roaming the Europeon countryside; putting on shows for whoever will take them in for the night. Allied brass thinks they are a bunch of spies. The truth is much worse: The circus is made up of damned souls. The firebreather can do more with fire than just breathe it,The strongman can flip a tank like an end table, and the clowns are ACTUALLY fitting into those tiny cars. All that makeup? Not just to make them look cheery and silly.... Thepipe90
83) The SS’s pagan worship has awakened a lovecraftian eldritch horror TheMarvelMan
84) It turns out Hitler is an alien with immense mind control powers who has hypnotized the axis into starting the war so the world will descend into chaos so it cannot effectively resist the incoming alien invasion. AndreTheSalty
85) Allied scientists unlock humanity's psionic potential. Thanks to a injected serum specially chosen and selected members unlock the power to read minds, throw objects with the power of thought, control others like puppets, and cause enemy's heads to explode. This advantage allows the allies to make huge advances however the germans manage to reverse engineer the serum, giving it to their own men. This results in the war becoming even more brutal and bloody as these psi troops are produced in increasing numbers. AndreTheSalty
86) Rumors of monsters attacking the Japs in a occupied Philippines has reached the ears of the emperor. They kept saying words like 'aswang', 'duwende', 'magkukulang', and 'tikbalang' among other words that seemed to be more stranger than the next. CAvenir
87) The back of soldiers dog tags suddenly display the name of the person who will kill them. The trouble is, not all of the names belong to enemies. HarshMillennium

Doom Patrol #4 - Movie Magic

DC Next presents:

Doom Patrol

Issue Four: Movie Magic

Written by DreamerDriver

Edited by: dwright5252

The two emerge looking at a large group of people in tight pants and weird, old looking costumes bustling about, setting a stage up behind a closed curtain. Niles and Robotman look down to see themselves dressed as 16th century French noblemen with ruffled shirts and tricorn hats. Niles rides in an old wheelchair with a large wicker seat and three wheels. Rita is dressed as a 16th century French mime. She marvels at her surroundings.
“Ah, Fandango. In this one, I play Lenore, a wealthy socialite who falls in love with a nobleman’s bastard, Noel. The two of us run away with a traveling acting troupe to escape Philippe, the Queen’s cousin, who I am meant to be married to.”
Robotman rolls his eyes. “Sounds terrific. Now why won’t you come home with us?”
“Oh Cliff, not now, one of my favorite scenes is about to happen. Just let me do this and I’ll explain everything.”
Robotman begins to say something but Niles interrupts him.
“We’d be happy to watch.”
Rita smiles as Niles backs up to watch. Robotman grudgingly follows.
A muscular, handsome man dressed as a mime, Noel, walks up to Rita.
“Lenore, we’ve almost done it. Once this performance is over, we can escape across the border, out of the Queen’s clutches.”
“Oh Noel, I was so right to trust in you. Without you, I would have been a miserable housewife, with nothing to do all day but clean the home, prepare Philippe’s meals, and take care of the many children we would inevitably have.”
“Yes, and now you get to do all of those things with me! As long as you don’t screw up tonight.”
“I’ll do my best Noel, I promise.”
Niles and Robotman exchange a look, concerned about the message this film is portraying.
Suddenly, from behind the curtain, a nobleman in the tightest pants and the most ruffled shirt, Phillippe, slices through.
“Lenore, I have come for you!”
Phillippe approaches Rita.
“You shall never have me.”
“I shall!”
Phillippe slices at Rita, cutting her face. As Noel draws his sword, Robotman and Niles rush forward.
“Rita!”
The two try to help Rita up, but she refuses their help.
“Get away, let me finish the scene.”
“But you’re hurt.”
“It’s what I have to do!”
Niles is made uncomfortable by the tone in which Rita says this.
Phillippe speaks up.
“And who are you two?”
Robotman responds.
“We’re Rita’s friends.”
“Whose Rita?”
“Oh screw off.”
“Hey, you can’t speak to me like that!”
Phillipe approaches Robotman. Noel butts in.
“Hey, you’re supposed to be fighting me, not him.”
“I will lick you in a second.”
“You will lick me now!”
The two begin to get in each other’s face right in front of Robotman. Robotman pushes them both, which causes them to go flying back. They land against the curtain, which falls against their weight, covering them. The two begin to tear at the curtain, trying to get it off.
“Well they’re not gonna be happy about that.”
Robotman turns to the others as Rita finally gets up off the floor.
“Looks like its exit stage left.”
“This would be stage right.”
“Close enough.”
The three run off again.
As Noel and Phillippe free themselves from the curtain, they look to see an old west sheriff and his posse looking down at them.
“You two pretty boys see a couple a weirdos and Annie Oakley around here?”
The three tower over a miniature city as they walk through Rita’s last major film, Gulliver’s Groove. Rita stomps away from Niles and Robotman, the three dressed in the hip 60s style of the day, with no concern for the tiny village she’s destroying. The sounds of tiny screams are heard at their feet, but they don’t pay attention to it.
Niles tries to catch up to her.
“Rita please, you can’t stay here.”
“If you don’t want to be here just leave, but I’m not going with you.”
“Rita, is this about your daughter?”
Rita stops.
She grabs the top of a skyscraper, her knuckles go white as she holds it, fighting back tears.
She crushes the top of the skyscraper.
She turns around to face Niles in a fury, but her tears stop her.
She falls to her knees.
Niles rolls up to her and embraces her. Robotman stands awkwardly to the side, but Niles nods him over, and he too joins the embrace.
“I have nothing. But here, I’m a star.”
They break the embrace and sit down on top of some flat top buildings. Niles moves next to Rita.
“How did this happen?”
“I haven’t left the house since Mia died. Her gone, and me thinking you were gone as well, Cliff, the Doom Patrol falling apart, it was all so much. I had tried to get pack into work, but the new agent I had gotten was only able to get cat food commercials and game shows. ‘The Farr brand had gone stale’. Insensitive prick. A few months ago, I was in a terrible spot, so my maid surprised me by pulling out all my old films from the garage. I tell you I did nothing but sit there and watch those over and over again. In the films, I’m safe, surrounded by happiness and people who love me. And then one day, I don’t know, I just wanted to go back. And so, I did.”
Robotman, still confused: “So you just walked into the screen, because you really wanted to? No to be insensitive but...”
Niles, not as confused: “Emotions are a powerful thing, Cliff. They have a powerful effect on your mind, your body, but the world around you as well. You hadn’t left your house in, what, years, Rita?”
Rita, trying not to let her emotions get the better of her again: “Definitely.”
“And you were miserable the whole time?”
“Yes, it’s embarrassing the things I thought.”
“And then the past couple of months, how have you felt?”
“Ecstatic.”
“And all of that was directed at the screen that was playing your movies.”
“I guess, yes.”
“With the amount of energy hanging in your house for years from your sadness, mixed with the powerful happiness you had directed at a specific point. Makes perfect sense to me.”
Robotman, trying not to let his emotions get the better of him, in the form of shaking Niles until he starts making sense: “I’m sure it does to you, Chief.”
“Whatever the case, Rita, you can’t stay here.”
Rita has come to tears again.
“But I can’t face the world out there, you won’t make me!”
Robotman steps in.
“Rita listen, I don’t want this to turn into ‘a very special Blossom’, so I’m just gonna say this. It doesn’t matter how magical emotions are or whatever, you can’t let them rule your life. It’s of course important to acknowledge them, and deal with them accordingly, but you can’t let them drive you to an unhealthy way of living. Like, living in movies from the 50’s. This has kinda gotten away from me. The point is you gotta be strong. I know you, Rita, you’re strong.”
Before Robotman could have a chance to finish the moral of this story, a bullet wizzes past his head. He looks back to see the sheriff and his posse joined by Noel and Phillippe.
“You get away from Annie.”
“Why does this dirty man keep calling Lenore Annie?”
“Hey, let’s focus on shooting first and asking questions later.”
The two men shrug at the sheriff's statement, and charge in as the cowboys start firing.
Robotman grabs Rita and Niles and throws them behind the small city skyline. In the haste Niles falls over. The three of them crouch down.
“Cliff, you take care of the swordsmen, I’ll take care of the guns. Rita…”
Niles looks at Rita, still sobbing, trying to get a hold of herself.
“Rita just stay down.”
Robotman hops over the buildings and engages with Noel and Phillipe. The two men swing at him, with Robotman blocking with his arms. The swords leave scratches, but nothing to worry about now. Robotman strikes back with a couple punches, hitting Noel, but Phillipe is able to jump back.
Meanwhile, Niles has inched himself back to his wheelchair.
“Activating combat mode.”
Niles tries to type on his button pad that isn’t there because it’s a wheelchair from the 60s.
“Oh wait, shit.”
Niles looks back at Robotman.
Phillipe has taken advantage of Robotman’s missed punch and thrusts forward with his sword. The sword isn’t able to break through the metal skin, but leaves a considerable cut. This cut is made worse by the bullet that hits it, coming from the sheriff and his men.
Robotman tries to fight back against Phillipe and Noel getting in a punch now and again, but the volley of shots and slices begin to have their toll. Swords and bullets aren’t usually a problem for the Robotman, but when it’s five guns and two swords against one out of practice robot, the odds begin to leave his favor.
Niles looks back at Rita, who looks on as Cliff is taken down to his knees by the repeated strikes. But he continues to fight.
Rita looks at Niles, scared.
“Robotman needs you, Elasti-Girl.”
Robotman, on his hands and knees, struggles to get up. Noel and Phillippe jab and swing at the helpless robot with all the joviality of an afternoon fencing match.
“I must say Phillippe, your form and talent with a sword reminds me a lot of myself.”
“You know, Noel, I was thinking the exact same thing, maybe we’re not so different you and---”
Phillippe is crushed by a giant foot.
Noel staggers back in horror, looking up to see his beloved Lenore, now dressed in a red white and purple dress, towering over him. His sword clatters to the ground as he makes a mad dash in the opposite direction.
Robotman looks up to see why everything has stopped, and sees a giant pinky outstretched to help him up. He grabs it and gets to his feet.
The sheriff’s men, who had stopped firing when they saw a 100-foot-tall Annie Oakley, begin to back away in fear. The sheriff doesn’t back down.
“Come on men, let’s take the freak down.”
The sheriff fires at Rita, and, with some reluctance, the rest of the men fire too.
Bullets begin to bounce off Elasti-Girl’s springy skin, which directs her attention away from Robotman, towards the cowboys. Elasti-Girl runs at them, each step destroying entire towns. She reaches the posse, and gives them a swift kick, knocking them into the distance, where they disappear into the darkness bordering the world.
Robotman watches the old maid run down the stairs carrying Rita’s large briefcase, impressed that she’s not only able to carry it, but run with it as well, after seeing the amount of things Rita packed in there. The maid hands the bag off to Rita. Niles shakes his head.
“Rita, you don’t need to bring all of this, your room is still completely furnished and the closet is completely stocked.”
“You kept those old rags? Niles, it’s all so last decade.”
Rita looks at the maid.
“What is your name again?”
The maid is absolutely floored by the fact that, not only is Rita talking to her, but asking her name! She takes a minute to compose, then answers.
“Gloria.”
“Gloria, thank you for taking such good care of me and the home while I was away. Now, I’m going to be gone for quite a long time again, so I will be hiring a new chef and new gardeners, but, while I’m gone, you’re in charge. Feel free to have the chef make you what you want, have friends over, and use the theatre, though be careful.”
“Oh no, Madame, you cannot do this. I cannot take your house.”
“Think of it as extended house sitting.”
Niles looks at his vibrating phone.
“That’s our car.”
The group say goodbye to Gloria and leave the house.
“Oh, it will be so good to be headquarters with all of us there.”
“One more stop before we head there, Rita.”
“And where is that Niles?”
“Indiana, we’ve got to pick up Negative Man and Negative Woman.”
Well well, looks like Elasti-Girl is back on the team. But what about the Negative Man and Negative Woman, are they ready to hop on the doom train, or is their pickle in some sort of brine? Find out in the next issue, Negative Parenting, or Focus on the Negative.
Hello darlings, this Rita Farr. Niles told me that he wants me to write a part of this... letter I guess, it’s not very clear, but whatever it is I’m happy to inform whoever you are on the history of me. My childhood was nothing too special, great in school, exceptionally at presentations, sang the national anthem at all the home games. I always knew I was destined for greatness. And I thought I’d achieved it, when my starring role as Annie Oakley had become a smash hit. My life was a dream for the next ten years, hit after hit, the world loved me. Then, in the 60’s, things changed. Films got different, and I couldn’t keep up. Soon, I was only getting roles like the aging mother, the kind neighbor. Could you imagine, America’s leading lady becoming second string? It just wouldn’t do.
And so, I left the business. I traveled the world, visited my adoring public. But as the years went on, that public turned into more of a private. That is to say, my fans started to dwindle. Without any fans, I was left to look at the world, and it wasn’t good. Pain and suffering, we had come so far from the world I had created in my pictures. And yes, I know the world wasn’t perfect in 1950, but my world was. The magic world of cinema. I had been blind, but maybe I could fix it. The only problem was, it was 1998, and I was old. I started asking around, I had become close with a lot of powerful people. There had to have been some sort of cure all, a fountain of youth. If it took money, I had it. That’s when I met Niles. Word had gotten to him about what I was looking for, and he offered it to me, free of charge. The only caveat was I would owe him a favor. I didn’t like the vagueness of the offer, but I was desperate. Niles explained the process as “a mixture of robotics, biotics, and ancient shaman medicines”. I was conscious for the whole thing and I still can’t tell you what happened. But it ended with a small injection.
After that, I felt my skin tightening, my heart starting beating stronger, I felt good. I rushed to the mirror, and my goodness, I looked 25 again. But then I didn’t. All of a sudden my skin drooped, I looked like a living skin bag. Niles explained that he had turned my skin elastic, in sense. It’s honestly all too complicated for me. The point was he had given me powers, powers that he could teach me to use, and in return I would work for him for a project he was working on. That project would go on to turn into the Doom Patrol. He showed me that, if I helped him, I could turn the world into the magical place I had always seen it as.
He was right.
And I’m so happy that we’re all back together.

[POEM] Catalog of Unabashed Gratitude - Ross Gay (for those in need of some positivity)

Friends, will you bear with me today, for I have awakened from a dream in which a robin made with its shabby wings a kind of veil behind which it shimmied and stomped something from the south of Spain, its breast a’flare, looking me dead in the eye from the branch that grew into my window, coochie-cooing my chin, the bird shuffling its little talons left, then right, while the leaves bristled against the plaster wall, two of them drifting onto my blanket while the bird opened and closed its wings like a matador giving up on murder, jutting its beak, turning a circle, and flashing, again, the ruddy bombast of its breast by which I knew upon waking it was telling me in no uncertain terms to bellow forth the tubas and sousaphones, the whole rusty brass band of gratitude not quite dormant in my belly — it said so in a human voice, “Bellow forth” — and who among us could ignore such odd and precise counsel?
Hear ye! hear ye! I am here to holler that I have hauled tons — by which I don’t mean lots, I mean tons — of cowshit and stood ankle deep in swales of maggots swirling the spent beer grains the brewery man was good enough to dump off holding his nose, for they smell very bad, though make the compost writhe giddy and lick its lips, twirling dung with my pitchfork again and again with hundreds and hundreds of other people, we dreamt an orchard this way, furrowing our brows, and hauling our wheelbarrows, and sweating through our shirts, and two years later there was a party at which trees were sunk into the well-fed earth, one of which, a liberty apple, after being watered in was tamped by a baby barefoot with a bow hanging in her hair biting her lip in her joyous work and friends this is the realest place I know, you could ride your bike there or roller skate or catch the bus there is a fence and a gate twisted by hand, there is a fig tree taller than you in Indiana, it will make you gasp. It might make you want to stay alive even, thank you;
and thank you for not taking my pal when the engine of his mind dragged him to swig fistfulls of Xanax and a bottle or two of booze, and thank you for taking my father a few years after his own father went down thank you mercy, mercy, thank you for not smoking meth with your mother oh thank you thank you for leaving and for coming back, and thank you for what inside my friends’ love bursts like a throng of roadside goldenrod gleaming into the world, likely hauling a shovel with her like one named Aralee ought, with hands big as a horse’s, and who, like one named Aralee ought, will laugh time to time til the juice runs from her nose; oh thank you for the way a small thing’s wail makes the milk or what once was milk in us gather into horses huckle-buckling across a field;
and thank you, friends, when last spring the hyacinth bells rang and the crocuses flaunted their upturned skirts, and a quiet roved the beehive which when I entered were snugged two or three dead fist-sized clutches of bees between the frames, almost clinging to one another, this one’s tiny head pushed into another’s tiny wing, one’s forelegs resting on another’s face, the translucent paper of their wings fluttering beneath my breath and when a few dropped to the frames beneath: honey; and after falling down to cry, everything’s glacial shine.
And thank you, too. And thanks for the corduroy couch I have put you on. Put your feet up. Here’s a light blanket, a pillow, dear one, for I can feel this is going to be long. I can’t stop my gratitude, which includes, dear reader, you, for staying here with me, for moving your lips just so as I speak. Here is a cup of tea. I have spooned honey into it.
And thank you the tiny bee’s shadow perusing these words as I write them. And the way my love talks quietly when in the hive, so quietly, in fact, you cannot hear her but only notice barely her lips moving in conversation. Thank you what does not scare her in me, but makes her reach my way. Thank you the love she is which hurts sometimes. And the time she misremembered elephants in one of my poems which, oh, here they come, garlanded with morning glory and wisteria blooms, trombones all the way down to the river. Thank you the quiet in which the river bends around the elephant’s solemn trunk, polishing stones, floating on its gentle back the flock of geese flying overhead.
And to the quick and gentle flocking of men to the old lady falling down on the corner of Fairmount and 18th, holding patiently with the softest parts of their hands her cane and purple hat, gathering for her the contents of her purse and touching her shoulder and elbow; thank you the cockeyed court on which in a half-court 3 v 3 we oldheads made of some runny-nosed kids a shambles, and the 61-year-old after flipping a reverse lay-up off a back door cut from my no-look pass to seal the game ripped off his shirt and threw punches at the gods and hollered at the kids to admire the pacemaker’s scar grinning across his chest; thank you the glad accordion’s wheeze in the chest; thank you the bagpipes.
Thank you to the woman barefoot in a gaudy dress for stopping her car in the middle of the road and the tractor trailer behind her, and the van behind it, whisking a turtle off the road. Thank you god of gaudy. Thank you paisley panties. Thank you the organ up my dress. Thank you the sheer dress you wore kneeling in my dream at the creek’s edge and the light swimming through it. The koi kissing halos into the glassy air. The room in my mind with the blinds drawn where we nearly injure each other crawling into the shawl of the other’s body. Thank you say it plain: fuck each other dumb.
And you, again, you, for the true kindness it has been for you to remain awake with me like this, nodding time to time and making that noise which I take to mean yes, or, I understand, or, please go on but not too long, or, why are you spitting so much, or, easy Tiger hands to yourself. I am excitable. I am sorry. I am grateful. I just want us to be friends now, forever. Take this bowl of blackberries from the garden. The sun has made them warm. I picked them just for you. I promise I will try to stay on my side of the couch.
And thank you the baggie of dreadlocks I found in a drawer while washing and folding the clothes of our murdered friend; the photo in which his arm slung around the sign to “the trail of silences”; thank you the way before he died he held his hands open to us; for coming back in a waft of incense or in the shape of a boy in another city looking from between his mother’s legs, or disappearing into the stacks after brushing by; for moseying back in dreams where, seeing us lost and scared he put his hand on our shoulders and pointed us to the temple across town;
and thank you to the man all night long hosing a mist on his early-bloomed peach tree so that the hard frost not waste the crop, the ice in his beard and the ghosts lifting from him when the warming sun told him sleep now; thank you the ancestor who loved you before she knew you by smuggling seeds into her braid for the long journey, who loved you before he knew you by putting a walnut tree in the ground, who loved you before she knew you by not slaughtering the land; thank you who did not bulldoze the ancient grove of dates and olives, who sailed his keys into the ocean and walked softly home; who did not fire, who did not plunge the head into the toilet, who said stop, don’t do that; who lifted some broken someone up; who volunteered the way a plant birthed of the reseeding plant is called a volunteer, like the plum tree that marched beside the raised bed in my garden, like the arugula that marched itself between the blueberries, nary a bayonette, nary an army, nary a nation, which usage of the word volunteer familiar to gardeners the wide world made my pal shout “Oh!” and dance and plunge his knuckles into the lush soil before gobbling two strawberries and digging a song from his guitar made of wood from a tree someone planted, thank you;
thank you zinnia, and gooseberry, rudbeckia and pawpaw, Ashmead’s kernel, cockscomb and scarlet runner, feverfew and lemonbalm; thank you knitbone and sweetgrass and sunchoke and false indigo whose petals stammered apart by bumblebees good lord please give me a minute; and moonglow and catkin and crookneck and painted tongue and seedpod and johnny jump-up; thank you what in us rackets glad what gladrackets us;
and thank you, too, this knuckleheaded heart, this pelican heart, this gap-toothed heart flinging open its gaudy maw to the sky, oh clumsy, oh bumblefucked, oh giddy, oh dumbstruck, oh rickshaw, oh goat twisting its head at me from my peach tree’s highest branch, balanced impossibly gobbling the last fruit, its tongue working like an engine, a lone sweet drop tumbling by some miracle into my mouth like the smell of someone I’ve loved; heart like an elephant screaming at the bones of its dead; heart like the lady on the bus dressed head to toe in gold, the sun shivering her shiny boots, singing Erykah Badu to herself leaning her head against the window;
and thank you the way my father one time came back in a dream by plucking the two cables beneath my chin like a bass fiddle’s strings and played me until I woke singing, no kidding, singing, smiling, thank you, thank you, stumbling into the garden where the Juneberry’s flowers had burst open like the bells of French horns, the lily my mother and I planted oozed into the air, the bazillion ants labored in their earthen workshops below, the collard greens waved in the wind like the sails of ships, and the wasps swam in the mint bloom’s viscous swill;
and you, again you, for hanging tight, dear friend. I know I can be long winded sometimes. I want so badly to rub the sponge of gratitude over every last thing, including you, which, yes, awkward, the suds in your ear and armpit, the little sparkling gems slipping into your eye. Soon it will be over,
which is precisely what the child in my dream said, holding my hand, pointing at the roiling sea and the sky hurtling our way like so many buffalo, who said it’s much worse than we think, and sooner; to whom I said no duh child in my dreams, what do you think this singing and shuddering is, what this screaming and reaching and dancing and crying is, other than loving what every second goes away? Goodbye, I mean to say. And thank you. Every day.

The New Generation of Self-Created Utopias As so-called intentional communities proliferate across the country, a subset of Americans is discovering the value of opting out of contemporary society.

The New Generation of Self-Created Utopias As so-called intentional communities proliferate across the country, a subset of Americans is discovering the value of opting out of contemporary society.
Ransom (a pseudonym) Heath, 42, and Eric Johnson, 36, on their way to feed the pigs at the East Wind intentional community in the Ozarks. Ransom (a pseudonym) Heath, 42, and Eric Johnson, 36, on their way to feed the pigs at the East Wind intentional community in the Ozarks.Credit...George Etheredge By Mike Mariani Jan. 16, 2020
THE EAST WIND COMMUNITY is hidden deep in the Ozarks of southern Missouri, less than 10 miles from the Arkansas border, surrounded by jagged hills and tawny fields. Getting there requires traversing country roads that rise, dip and twist through chicken-wire-fenced farmsteads and grazing pastures cluttered with rusty agricultural equipment until you reach 1,145 acres of largely undeveloped highland forest, where cedar, oak, pine and mulberry create a dense canopy. Beneath that are 27 buildings and structures, including four large dormitories, nine personal shelters, a kitchen and dining facility, an automobile shop, a nut butter manufacturing plant and a cold-storage warehouse, all built over the years by the community since its founding in 1974. Outside, farm animals — six piglets, 50 chickens, several dozen brown-and-white cows — crunch through the carpet of winter leaves.
Nearby, a pair of women make their way down a muddy field, one pushing a wheelbarrow, to a weathered-gray wooden barn where they’ll draw gallons of milk from their dairy cows. A reedy man with a long, sandy mullet presses a chain saw to the base of a tree trunk. People stop each other on the dirt paths, asking about the understaffed forestry program, or recounting anecdotes about going into town to sort through credit card charges. Everyone has somewhere to be, yet no one is hurried. There are no smartphones in sight. The collective feels like a farm, a work exchange and a bustling household rolled into one, with much work to be done but many hands to be lent.
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Continue reading the main story Image Aubrey DeLone, 31, harvests kale from a community garden.Credit...George Etheredge Image Milk drips onto a dairy cow's hoof.Credit...George Etheredge East Wind is what its 72 residents call an intentional community, a modern descendant of the utopian colonies and communes of centuries past where individuals share everything from meals, chores and living space to work, income, domestic responsibilities and the burden of self-governance. The term intentional community dates to the late 1940s, when the Inter-Community Exchange — an organization formed in Yellow Springs, Ohio, in the wake of World War II to help promote peaceful, cooperative living arrangements (in the hope of eradicating war altogether) — changed its name to the Fellowship of Intentional Communities; the founders felt the new title better conveyed the deliberateness with which these groups were assembling. The members of East Wind, for example, range in age from infancy to 76: Some have lived here for more than three decades, but around half of the population is part of a new wave, people in their late 20s and early 30s who joined in the last four years. These newer residents moved to East Wind to wean themselves off fossil fuels, grow their own food, have a greater say in how their society is run and live in less precarious financial circumstances.
According to Sky Blue, the 39-year-old executive director of the Foundation for Intentional Community and a former member of the Virginia-based commune Twin Oaks, which was founded in 1967, the number of intentional communities listed in the FIC’s directory nearly doubled between 2010 and 2016 (the last year the directory was published), to roughly 1,200. Although the number of people living in these communities is hard to pin down — the demographic is often deliberately off the grid — Blue estimates that there are currently around 100,000 individuals residing in them. “There’s an obvious growth trend that you can chart,” he said; millennials “get this intentional community thing more than people in the past.”
Image The road winds through open prairie en route to East Wind.Credit...George Etheredge Image Chris Turner, 27, walks the community’s vast property, which encompasses 1,200 acres.Credit...George Etheredge Image Don Rust, 69, assembles a rope sandal for East Wind’s sandal company, Utopian. Rust has lived in the community for more than 30 years.Credit...George Etheredge Image Austin, 24, blends in with the Ozarks’ autumn leaves.Credit...George Etheredge THE UNITED STATES HAS been a laboratory for experiments in alternative living since its founding. The English Puritans and Pilgrims who, wishing to escape the oppression and persecution of the Church of England, fled to America in the early 17th century to create smaller societies where they could live according to their faith were followed, notably, by the Transcendentalists in 1830s New England, who sought to distance themselves from the ruthlessness of the Industrial Revolution and instead lead a life driven by Romantic ideals.
In 1841, George and Sophia Ripley, Unitarians inspired by that Transcendentalist ethos, bought a 188-acre parcel of hills and pinewood forests in the West Roxbury neighborhood of Boston, where they started one of the country’s earliest and most influential utopian communities, called Brook Farm. To fund the project, the couple created a joint stock company with 10 other initial investors; they sold shares for $500, promising investors 5 percent of annual profits, which they hoped to earn by selling handmade clothing, collecting tuition from a private school run by Sophia and offering tours to curious outsiders for a small fee. George even wrote to Ralph Waldo Emerson, the founder of Transcendentalism, in 1840, in hopes that the movement’s putative leader might join or otherwise invest in his social experiment, arguing that, at Brook Farm, “thought would preside over the operations of labor, and labor would contribute to the expansion of thought” in order to achieve “industry without drudgery.”
Because Brook Farm aspired to so many goals — abolishing the class system, promoting gender parity, dividing labor equitably, privileging intellectual and leisure pursuits, promoting self-improvement — it attracted social reformers and early feminists, theologians and authors (Nathaniel Hawthorne was a founding member). Though it peaked at just 32 people and was officially shuttered in 1847 after being devastated by debt, smallpox and a fire, it became an American model for subsequent utopian projects. Over the following decades, more communities, including the Amana Colonies in Iowa and the Oneida Colony in upstate New York, served as sanctuaries from materialism and modernity. By the early 1900s, though, many of these had collapsed under the weight of financial pressures, ideological strife and tensions between the fantasy of social enlightenment and the realities of manual labor and working-class living conditions.
It wasn’t until the decades after World War II, when large numbers of Americans began questioning their nation’s sociopolitical and environmental policies, that the desire to create alternative societies was renewed, leading to the “hippie communes” that would become indelible features of the 20th-century cultural landscape. Places like Strawberry Fields in Southern California, The Farm in central Tennessee and Drop City in rural Colorado encapsulated the radical freedom, social experimentation and consciousness expansion that came to define the 1960s and 1970s. By borrowing openly from the psychedelic movement, artist collectives such as Ant Farm, Fluxus and Art Workers’ Coalition, as well as subcultures like the Merry Pranksters, the Nature Boys and, too, the rising environmentalist movement — some of which had emerged in response to the Vietnam War — these new communes tapped into an iconoclastic strain of society that embraced socialist ideals and Eastern philosophical tenets (including detachment, spontaneity and pacifism), rejecting many of the prevailing middle-class values of the time, including the primacy of the nuclear family and the zeal for conspicuous consumption (upon joining The Farm, for instance, all members took vows of poverty). Many of these communes, lacking any codified organizational structure and struggling to cultivate steady income, eventually faltered, but they had already achieved a kind of dubious cultural immortality, ultimately becoming the nation’s measure for the alternative living arrangements and utopian enterprises that followed.
Image Mardock, 38, puts his hand on the head of a recently slaughtered cow at FooPin, East Wind’s processing facility.Credit...George Etheredge Image Mariah Figgs, 20, and her partner Kris Gilstrap, 29, stand in front of their personal shelter.Credit...George Etheredge
WHILE HIPPIE COMMUNES have become a cliché, their DNA has nevertheless been passed down to some of today’s intentional communities. Consider Cedar Moon, tucked inside a state park on seven acres of farmland near the outskirts of Portland, Oregon. Up until 2004, the property was rented out to a rotating cast of free-spirited artists, activists and musicians, who lived in two old-growth timber-frame houses. When a developer offered the owner $1.5 million to convert the land into a housing development, longtime residents banded together to save it from a fate that would not only have left them homeless, but was antithetical to their values. In February 2005, 16 residents raised $125,000 in a month to buy the developer’s option contract — effectively removing the immediate threat — and then scrambled to secure the $1.5 million required to buy the property (nearly half of which, ironically, came from bank loans) over the next year.
In addition to the two original houses and a ramshackle barn, the property now consists of a sauna, yurt, outdoor kitchen, performance stage, composting-toilet outhouse and elaborate, brightly-painted gazebo that the 20 residents, who built everything themselves, call the T-Whale. Several of the structures are made of cob, a composite of clay, sand and straw that was popularized in England in the late Middle Ages and is extremely energy-efficient because of its high thermal mass. Almost everyone earns income outside of the community — Cedar Moon is not technically a commune according to the FIC definition — and current members, primarily people in their 30s and 40s and their children, include several teachers, a therapist, a director at a nonprofit and an accountant. While everyone keeps their finances separate, they share groceries, appliances (there’s one washer and dryer) and operate based on consensus. “It’s such an anticapitalist thing, just to share,” said Brenna Bell, an environmental lawyer who lives there. “Our economy relies on growth. It relies on people consuming. And we are going very intentionally in the opposite direction.”
Members must contribute 10 hours of labor each week, which might include tending the apple orchard, milking the herd of goats or cooking for the community (living expenses total around $600 a month). Cedar Moon isn’t off the power grid, but its residents have a dramatically smaller carbon footprint than the average American because they share resources, grow much of their own produce, use composting toilets and heat their homes with wood-burning stoves. Vinnie Inzano, a 30-year-old graduate student in marriage and family therapy, moved to Cedar Moon a year and a half ago because he didn’t want to be “plugged into systems that are causing collapse,” he said; he feels the community offers a better way of coexisting with the environment, “combating the story of extraction.”
Earthaven, which consists of 329 densely forested acres within North Carolina’s Blue Ridge Mountains, and was founded in 1994 by 18 people in their 30s and 40s, takes sustainability even more seriously. The community of roughly 100 people, which member Chris Farmer described as “overeducated suburban refugees,” is entirely off the grid. Several solar panels, a micro-hydropower system and smaller photovoltaic installations scattered throughout the property’s hills provide all the necessary energy for residents, who are divided into 11 smaller neighborhoods, each with anywhere from one to 14 homes made of earthen plaster, straw bale and lumber felled on the land. Rachel Fee, a 39-year-old herbalist, moved to Earthaven in 2017 after five years living outside Asheville, N.C. She wanted a more communal lifestyle that fit her ideals and didn’t push her to work relentlessly; here, she’s no longer “inundated with the idea that productivity is your self-worth,” she said. But Fee was also clear that her living arrangement was uniquely challenging, requiring a willingness to fully cohabit with others. Her 800-square-foot, reddish-brown straw-bale home sits on a gently sloping hill that she shares with 20 people living in nine structures huddled closely together. The residents get their water from the same spring and bathe in the same bathhouse. “This is not an idealistic situation,” she said. “It’s not running away from the world and sticking our head in the sand — it’s reinventing the wheel.”
Image Tom Bailey, 62, has lived at East Wind for nearly 38 years.Credit...George Etheredge Image Angelo Goodreau, 16 months, stands in front of an East Wind building.Credit...George Etheredge Image Channel Salmons, 30, with her Alembic Hydro cell.Credit...George Etheredge Image Maddie sits on top of a woodpile.Credit...George Etheredge IN 2017 BJORN GRINDE and Ranghild Bang Nes, researchers with the Norwegian Institute of Public Health, co-authored a paper on the quality of life among North Americans living in intentional communities. Along with David Sloan Wilson, director of the evolutionary studies program at Binghamton University, and Ian MacDonald, a graduate assistant, they contacted more than 1,000 people living in 174 communities across the U.S. and Canada and asked them to rate their happiness level on the Satisfaction With Life Scale (SWLS), a globally recognized measurement tool. They compared these results to a widely cited 2008 study by the psychologists William Pavot and Ed Diener, which surveyed past studies that used the scale to analyze 31 disparate populations — including Dutch adults, French-Canadian university students and the Inuit of northern Greenland — and discovered that members of intentional communities scored higher than 30 of the 31 groups. Living in an intentional community, the authors concluded, “appears to offer a life less in discord with the nature of being human compared to mainstream society.” They then hypothesized why that might be: “One, social connections; two, sense of meaning; and three, closeness to nature.”
Though many residents of intentional communities are undoubtedly frustrated by climate inaction and mounting economic inequality, others are joining primarily to form stronger social bonds. According to a study published last year by researchers at the University of California San Diego, more than three-quarters of American adults now experience moderate to high levels of loneliness — rates that have more than doubled over the last 50 years. Despite rising housing costs across the country, more Americans are living alone today than ever before. As Boone Wheeler, a 33-year-old member of East Wind, told me, “There are literal health consequences to loneliness: Your quality of life goes down due to lack of community — you will die sooner.”
Last February, Sumner Nichols, a 29-year-old who grew up in Pennsylvania and moved to East Wind four years ago, invited me to visit the community, which was originally established by a group of men and women who had been living at Twin Oaks and decided they wanted to use the knowledge and experience they accumulated to start their own commune. After amassing a handful of followers during stops in Vermont and Massachusetts, the fledgling group eventually settled in the Ozarks because the land was cheap and adjacent to water. The residents, whose commitment to industry has helped ensure East Wind’s longevity, crafted rope hammocks by hand in partnership with Twin Oaks in the 1970s before launching their own jarred nut-butter business in the early 1980s; their products, which are mainly sold across the Midwest, typically gross between $2 million and $3 million annually. All adult members of East Wind must work 35 hours per week in various capacities, whether cooking, gardening, milling lumber, maintaining infrastructure, looking after the animals or working in the manufacturing plant. Because it’s a relatively modest schedule, residents have enough free time to cultivate personal passions: Nichols practices wildlife photography, while other members produce and record music, study herbal medicine and create ceramics using the community kiln.
Even in the dead of winter, the property is stunning, with its undulating textures of ridges, glades and limestone escarpments. It was obvious how living here could reconnect people to the land, letting them hike, climb, swim and harvest in a way that is beyond reach for most Americans. As we passed a three-story dormitory painted Egyptian blue, Nichols told me that, as a college student in the late 2000s, he tumbled down what he calls the “climate change research hole,” reading websites that pored over grim scientific projections about an increasingly warmer planet. He’d joined the Bloomington, Indiana, chapter of the Occupy movement for a while, but saw the blaze of indignation dwindle to fumes without any lasting political victories. Afterward, Nichols felt wholly disillusioned by the corporations and government organizations that he felt had a stranglehold on his life. “It’s going to go how it goes,” he recalled thinking, so “how do you want to live in it?” After discovering several intentional communities online — many find East Wind and others through simple Google searches — he concluded that joining one was “just a more comfortable way of living right now.”
Image Richard “Boone” Wheeler, 33, stands in front of Lick Creek.Credit...George Etheredge Image East Wind Nut Butters’s almond butter.Credit...George Etheredge Image Kendra knitting.Credit...George Etheredge Image Chris Incorvia, 36, sits on a bucket in the community’s auto body shop.Credit...George Etheredge As evening approached, we met several residents who had decided to take advantage of the unseasonably warm weather by gathering at one of East Wind’s “swimming holes” — sandbanks that run alongside Lick Creek and provide easy swimming access. As the setting sun glinted off the gently rippling water, one 31-year-old resident, who goes by the mononym Indo and who had been at East Wind for five and a half years, discussed what brought him to the community: “When I was in Babylon,” he said, using the term members of East Wind half-sarcastically deploy to refer to mainstream society, “all I did was follow economics.” While the residents have similar issues and problems as people outside of an intentional community, he added, here they were free from the cutthroat hierarchies that dominated the broader culture. “Instead of your boss telling you what to do, it turns into a social relationship,” he said. “We’re just reframing it from a different perspective.” Indeed, if there is any sense of romanticism running through the community — one that harks back to Brook Farm’s belief in a daily life in which individual freedoms are more fully realized and moral convictions more faithfully observed — it lies in the notion that none of us, actually, have to be complicit to political, social and economic forces with which we don’t agree.
But unless people are raised in an intentional community or something closely resembling one, they must still find a way to relinquish whatever perch they’ve already carved out for themselves before moving to one of these places. The choice is reminiscent of a line from Henry Thoreau’s “Walden” (1854), in which the Transcendentalist author assures the reader that if he were to follow a more intrepid path, he “will pass an invisible boundary; new, universal, and more liberal laws will begin to establish themselves around and within him; or the old laws will be expanded, and interpreted in his favour in a more liberal sense…. He will live with the license of a higher order of beings.” There will always, however, be the daunting task of letting go.

WP: Hoosier Diner

Midnight Visits to Apple Chapel

Living in a small town, one of my favorite things to do is cruising the back roads and exploring. I've always been fascinated to see where the drive takes me, checking out scenery and happening upon houses that I wouldn't normally see on the main roads. And sometimes I like to travel some of the roads I have previously discovered after dark. Sometimes.
When I was around 13 or 14, one of my adventures led me to a little church named Apple Chapel (at this age I was still too young to be driving, but my uncle the antique dealer shared this passion with me). It's in the middle of nowhere in southern Indiana. Attached to the church is a small, quaint graveyard to the right. On the left is a gravel parking lot. It is surrounded by woods. To see this place in broad daylight, most people wouldn't bat an eye. It's actually not spooky looking. (Youngs Creek, IN.)
On the day of discovering the small lane that led to the church, I got spooked nearly a mile before passing Apple Chapel. Didn't even see it yet, let alone know it was there. I remember feeling strange, got goosebumps, the whole 9 yards. So did my uncle. He turned the music off and slowed the car. (This is still in daylight.)
My uncle asked me, "Do you feel that?"
"Yup. It feels like we shouldn't be here for some reason," was my response. Or something similar.
"What do you think is...", he slammed the brakes, nearly choking me with the seatbelt.
At first I was looking at him, but I instantly followed his gaze. There it was: the church with its tombstones. (I seen the graveyard first because it was on my right side, nearly 15 feet away or so.)
My breath caught and I thought I was too young for a heart attack. It was instant bad vibes. Although it didn't look creepy, it felt creepy. (We later confided with each other that it was almost as if we could feel vibrations, actual, physical vibrations, emanating from all around us.)
So, my uncle pulled over to the side of the road and got out of the car. I hesitantly followed. We didn't say much at this point but I could tell he was shaken by this place, to the extent that I could see his hands slightly tremble when he lit a cigarette. We didn't stay long; just walked through the cemetery, looking at different headstones. Then left.
It was eerie, the way we both felt something ominous, out of place, at the same time. Really fucking weird.
That was the beginning of several more visits to Apple Chapel. What frightened us also fascinated us.
(When at school I asked around to see if anyone had any information about the place. Nope. Checked the local library and found nothing. Basically, could not find anything about the little church in the remote location. To this day I have not encountered anyone who has had bad feelings, ghost stories, anything unusual happen to them from Apple Chapel.)
The first time my uncle and I went there after nightfall was nothing to brag about really. But we still felt an evil presence, and the creep factor was through the roof! If I remember correctly, there might have been a security light on the parking lot side of the building but not the graveyard side. Seems like that was the case. We drove by crawling at a snail's pace, it being on the passenger side of the car. (Go figure, right next to me if the dead suddenly sprang to life! Not that I believe in that, but it was part of the creep factor.) I remember the moon being out but not bright. Heard twigs breaking from the woods nearby, probably a deer. But other than that it was too quiet. No other sounds period: no frogs, or owls, or crickets, or even noise from the wind. Dead silent except the twigs and the sound of the tires on the pavement. We left. (After leaving it took us both several miles to shake the uneasiness. Hell, I still felt it after arriving back home.)
Now, this was not a nightly occurrence. We knew better than to take a midnight cruise out there very often.
Occasionally, though, we would take someone with us. One time, on an after-dark cruise, I brought one of my friends along for the ride. We were having fun jamming to music and talking and whatnot. My uncle made it a point to avoid Apple Chapel that night, driving 25 miles south of it on the highway. On the return trip home he decided to use his GPS and take some country roads back. (This was not in the vicinity of the Chapel.) About 45 minutes later, traveling roads we have never been on before, his GPS suddenly goes bonkers and croaks! It just started going fuzzy-like, and died. (Which it shouldn't have because it was wired through the car and used the car's battery.)
So now we were lost, in an unfamiliar neck of the woods, with a little less than half a tank of gas. Fuck me running! About 5-6 minutes later there's the damn church! (Two notes here: 1. We were familiar with the area surrounding the church, even after midnight, and we didn't notice anything we recognized before seeing the church. 2. My uncle didn't plan for this as he intentionally wanted to avoid it that particular night.) My uncle's face went from trying to joke about being lost to oh shit real quick. Needless to say I informed my buddy of finding Apple Chapel by accident and how it freaked me out, yet still felt compelled to check it out every so often. Like drawn to it. He laughed it off and joked around, blah blah blah. We made it back home safely.
I will never forget this. We should have stayed far away from Apple Chapel...but we did not. On a school night, after talking with my uncle and reminiscing about our ghostly experiences (for some reason we had quite a lot of encounters together), he asks me if I wanted to take a short cruise. As the next day I had school, I was reluctant but agreed. Our destination was, of course, Apple Chapel. This was around 9:30, 9:45 pm. From where I lived it took about 20, 25 minutes to get there. We would be gone for an hour tops. Okay, sure, let's go.
We're almost there. The hairs on my arms stand on end. Chills travel my spine. I can feel it in my bones. Suddenly, my teeth chatter. Feels like the temperature dropped 15°. The car thermometer read 40° F. Pretty sure the temp did in fact drop. The church comes into view with the headlights. Pitch black tonight. No moon. Also no security light. My uncle pulls the car slightly off the road and comes to a stop.
"I just want to look around for a few then we will head back home," he says.
I shrugged and said, "Ok."
(We have done this before. Just parked next to the graveyard, got out and walked a bit...just seeing if anything weird would happen.)
He shut the car off. Extinguished the headlights. Got out and to the front of the car, just to my side of the vehicle. No more than a minute had passed. I was ready to get my ass to bed.
"Uncle James, I have school tomorrow. Nothing is happening tonight. It's too dark to really see anything anyway and I'm freezing. Let's go!" That's all I said.
"Yeah, you're right. Let's boogie back," he replied.
(This all happened with a minute or 2 of him shutting the car off.)
So, he gets in the car and turns the key over. Click-click-click-click-click. Nothing! Tries again. Click-click-click-click. Still nothing! Tries a 3rd time to no avail!! (You can hear the starter grow weaker through each attempt.)
Keep in mind that the car is in pretty good shape. He's had no problems with it besides the GPS going out, and now this. (He even had the GPS looked at but never had it fixed.) No signs of any trouble whatsoever.
I'm freaking the hell out! "James, this can't be happening! What the fuck do we do!? I've got school tomorrow! We don't have a cell phone! Why tonight!?"
I literally sounded like a frantic girl lol! (Thanks puberty and sheer terror! I'm a guy, btw.)
The more we tried to start the car, the weaker it got. I tried jumping the solonoid. Nope. Tried everything we could possibly think of with the car. Nothing worked.
We had to stay the fucking night. Definitely were not going to walk several miles in either direction at this time of night. Not way out in the sticks. We could be food for coyotes or other creatures of the night. We could wander onto someone's property and be shot at. Anything was possible.
It seemed like hours passed, and there we sat in the cold ass car, trying to survive for the night. I'd say the temperature was in the mid 30s at this point. I finally got the nerve to check the trunk. Maybe there was something there we could use for warmth. My uncle got out with my scared-ass.
That's when we heard it. A sharp crack, such as an axe splitting wood or something similar. It came from the opposite side of the road down in the woods a little ways. And at the exact same moment we heard what sounded like deep, quiet chuckling in the woods behind the cemetery.
My uncle, "What the fuck was that?"
Me, "I dunno. And hope we don't find out."
I called out to see if I would get a response. Nothing...then we seen what looked like the faint glow of an old lantern about 20 to 30 feet behind the treeline of the graveyard. It swung lightly, and only got a brief glimpse of it before disappeared.
(This took place while I did indeed find a flimsy, thin blanket in the trunk. Something my uncle used to wrap around antiques that he forgot about.)
"Fuck this, help me push the car past the church and next to the gravel lot on the other side," I told my uncle.
We managed to do so, too.
By this time it was past midnight and the entire time of being stranded not a single car had went by us. By 2 a.m. our fear had subsided slightly. Around 2:30 we heard what sounded like a baby crying behind us, further up the road beyond the cemetery. I'm pretty sure it was a coyote, but it still put me on edge again. Around 3 a.m. I heard something that I couldn't distinguish, and when I looked at the graveyard behind us, I swore I seen blackness moving in the darkness. (Like shadows.) It's likely it could have been tree limbs moving, but I don't believe that. My uncle seen the movement as well, and we thought it was some dark entity. Who knows? I finally crashed from my adrenaline rush shortly after that.
When I woke up it was turning daylight. My uncle said someone went by but didn't stop. So we put the car at an angle in the road, forcing whoever was next to come to our rescue. It was a school bus. The driver said he radioed it in. We moved the car so he could be on his way. 2 more vehicles passed. We put the car back at an angle and finally a DNR guy helped us. We didn't tell him exactly what happened, only that the car died and wouldn't restart as we were passing through.
The very next day my uncle was in front of a prestigious hotel in our area. (French Lick, IN.) He was stopping to get gas. Before he turned into the gas station, the car caught on fire. He left it sit at the intersection, and before he reached the gas pumps, the car literally exploded!
We always said that a demon got into the car that night. It's hard to say that for sure, but I'm a true believer in the paranormal.

Years ago, I wrote an edgy Garfield crackfic featuring an OC I didn't realize was a walking stereotype at the time. Upon rediscovering it today, I died inside.

The troposphere and stratosphere were completely cloudless one summer day; this example of clear weather allowed the sun to shine on the town on Muncie, Indiana without anything getting in its way. A tiny hole in the ozone layer, though, made this day excruciatingly scorching for the Muncie residents. Said residents included a thirty-something-year-old man who was the proud owner of a fat, orange cat and a stupid, yellow dog (whose former owner ditched him without any warning many, many years ago).
Sweat ran down Garfield's entire body as he lay motionless on the table. Odie, panting much harder than usual, also climbed onto the tabletop and began to sniff Garfield's sweaty foot.
"Odie...no," moaned Jon Arbuckle, also uncomfortable by the heat. "We don't lick sweat off other people." Odie did anyway, much to the annoyance of Garfield.
Jon sighed heavily. "That's it, Odie." He was not really all that angry because he was suffering from the extreme heat— in fact, the heat made him nearly apathetic about everything— but bad dogs must be punished. However, Odie managed to get in one lick of Garfield's sweat before Jon forcefully grabbed him and took him away to be spanked for misbehaving. This left just Garfield.
"I hate this. It's too freakin' hot. If it were any hotter, I'd seriously consider taking off my fur, going outside, and dancing around naked. But it wouldn't be a good dance. It would be a stupid dance that would probably get me driven to the vet if Jon saw it. But in this heat, that wouldn't be so bad."
His inner monologue was interrupted by the doorbell ringing. He jumped off the table to answer the door.
He immediately yelped and recoiled a little.
It was him.
Why did it have to be him?
"Is anything the matter, Garfield? It's just me, the world's cutest and dankest kitty cat!"
The elder cat rubbed the tears of 'oh dear God I can't do this anymore I'm going to kill myself right now' out of his eyes. Thankfully, Nermal didn't notice this.
"Aren't you going to say anything to me?" asked Nermal as he barged in before Garfield could slam the door on him.
"How do you keep your fur so tidy in this awful heatwave?" was the only question Garfield could think of. He envied how Nermal didn't have sweat running down his body and matting his fur at the moment.
"That's a dumb question! It's obviously becau—"
Garfield stopped him. "Yes, I know. It's because you're sooooo cute. Know what? No, Nermal, you're not cute." He grabbed him by the neck and lifted him up so they were seeing eye-to-eye. "In fact, you are an ugly, smelly, annoying, stupid, retarded, uncute little rat. Your mother should have aborted you as soon as she saw the ultrasound. Now stop pestering me, get the HELL out of my house, AND NEVER COME VISIT ME EVER AGAIN! You are BANNED from here, you pathetic little twerp!" He pushed Nermal outside as hard as he could. He then slammed the door. As he was about to go take a cold shower, Garfield realized the sharp pain coursing throughout his body, and happened to glance down and see his fingers trapped in the door.
There was a loud shriek from inside.
Nermal stood on the stoop, facing the closed front door, and was completely frozen in shock. After a few minutes, he started shaking, barely noticeable at first, but gradually becoming harder and more violent until Nermal turned around and ran as fast as he could down the street, screeching at the top of his lungs as "Crawling" by Linkin Park played in the background.
He kept running until he noticed a car in the distance, growing bigger and bigger. "I'll show Garfield!" poor Nermal sniffled. "Yeah, I'll show him!" He went into a sprint, straight towards the car and its unaware driver.
As the gap began to close between them, a giant, demented, toothy smile contorted onto Nermal's face.
"GOODBYE, WORLD!"
...
Garfield was still trying to get his fingers out of the door. The thought of simply opening the door never crossed his mind, so he just kept pulling and straining. He tugged one final time, as hard as he could, and was thrown backward into a wall. He did it. Unfortunately, his fingers suffered from having their blood circulation cut off, and pressure built up inside them as a result. When Garfield got his hand loose, the resulting waves of blood coming to his fingers was too much for his body to handle. His fingers swelled up for a second, and then popped, subsequently flooding the house with hundreds and hundreds of gallons of dark red blood.
The house got so full of blood that it exploded, and Garfield flew out of the chimney on a flying Pop-Tart. His paw was still squirting blood, so it looked sort of like Nyan Cat but with Garfield, and blood.
...
The sound of muffled rap music disturbed the peace of the neighborhood. It got so loud that some of the animals living in the woods behind the neighborhood cut their wrists and shot themselves. The offending noise was coming from a 1979 Pontiac Bonneville sedan cruising down the road— at about 10 miles an hour, to be more precise— and the rear bumper was covered with Westboro Baptist Church inspired bumper stickers, saying things like "GOD HATES YOUR TEARS," "TOO LATE TO PRAY," "NO REST FOR THE WICKED," and most shockingly, "THANK GOD FOR DEAD CHILDREN". A giant outlined trollface decal took up the whole rear window, implying that the bumper stickers did not reflect the driver's actual beliefs, but were put there as a joke to troll other drivers. The custom plate read "AYYMATE".
Most interestingly, the front grille had a small grey cat plastered on it. As Nyanfield flew over the city, he lowered in altitude just enough to make out a grey blob on the front of a car that was entering the drive-thru for Hardee's. "Oh noez!" he articulated internally. "I must save Nermal!" But his fingers started spraying blood even more than they already were, and he started to feel a little bit weak from the blood loss. "Screw this..." he decided. "I must save ME!" Losing the Pop-Tart and gaining a blue cape for some reason, he raised a bloody finger into the air and said, "To Muncie Veterinary Clinic! The Caped Avenger... away!" He then flew off in the opposite direction.
Down below...
"THNKYUFCHUZINGHARDYSWTCANIGTFRYUTDAY," blared the drive-thru worker through the old distorted drive-thru speaker.
The Bonneville driver, whose name was Swizzle C, was a morbidly obese, ugly African-American man who was wearing cringey "bling". He sighed. "Dey really need ta git dat goddamn thang fixed," he muttered. He had a very deep voice, between baritone and bass, but closer to bass. Neglecting to turn down the volume on the radio, the fat-arse started to take his order. "Yo, man, can I git a #2 with extra mizzle, hold da fliboppityrizzle? N'hurry da mothafuc—"
"SURKYNYUPLEZTRNDARADYODWNSIKANHERBTTR?" the employee asked.
After pausing to decipher the garbled sentence from the speaker, Swizzle replied, "Ya want me ta turn down my dopeass tunes? Please, you ugly anyway." He floored the gas and hightailed the Pontiac out of Hardee's, flipping off the 70-something lady at the first window as he went around. After which he rear-ended the car waiting at the second window at 54 miles an hour.
An angry white man stepped out of his 2013 Chevrolet Sonic LT and knocked on the driver's side window of the car behind him. Swizzle C pressed the power window switch (you had to special-order the power windows on cars back in 1979) to roll down the window. "You smash up my car?" growled the man quietly. It was none other than Jon Arbuckle.
"AWWW HELLLL NAAAWWW, cracka," scoffed Swizzle C, as if the whole thing was no big deal. "You let it git smashed up yourself by sittin' in da middle of da damn parkin' lot."
"For your information, I was waiting for them to hand me my food," Jon retorted. "You know how hard you hit my car?"
Continuing to wave off the incident as if it was nothing, Swizzle replied, "Ahh, I di'in't hit it dat hard."
"Oh, really? Well, look at what you did to my trunk!" Swizzle got out to see what he did. Jon's trunk was all crumpled up.
"Ha! You cereal, sonnnn? I compacted yo' trunk, playa!"
"You know how much money I have to pay to get this fixed?!"
"Ah dun give a fuuuuuuuuck! Look at my ride!" Swizzle C pointed to the damage on his own car. "LOOK AT DA HEADLIGHT!" He was more upset about the slightly cracked headlight than the messed-up bumper or the bent, contorted hood lid. Or the cat on his grille, for that matter.
"You know what? That's your own problem." said Jon calmly. "Know why? You are an asshole. A self-centered, narcissistic asshole who cares about nobody but yourself. You're also a fat, bloated, tub of lard who probably sits at home all day on welfare because you're too lazy to go out and find a job and work for a living. Your gold dollar-sign earrings are not cool; neither is your "SWAG" necklace or your outdated afro. You are a sick bastard and I hope you rot in Hell. Have a horrible day! Good! Bye!" Swizzle C stood there unfazed throughout the whole speech, until he heard the brunette Caucasian man say "I knew the racists were right when they said blacks were bad news!" under his breath as he turned to get back into his Chevy.
"DAT'S IT! FULL NIGGAAAA!" he shouted, as if he were powering up. Then he screamed, "IMMA BUST A CAP IN YO AAAASSSS!" With that, he pulled out a machine gun and opened fire on innocent Jon, who skillfully dodged the streams of bullets, snatched Swizzle's gun, snapped it in half on his knee, and struck Swizzle across the head with one half of it. Now weaponless, the black fatso punched Jon right in the nose. A fistfight broke up, stirring up a cartoon... dust cloud...
...
The scene cut to the vet's office, where Garfield had finished getting stitches in his fingers. "There you go," cooed Liz sweetly as she finished wrapping gauze around his paw. She kissed him and gave him a sucker. It was blue raspberry, Garfield's favorite. After sending him on his way with a pat on the head, Liz sighed, "Oh, it's so nice to see Garfield without seeing Jon." She frowned. "Stupid Jon and his flirting. Yecch!"
...
Both men, by this time, were bruised and bloody. Jon even had a black eye. They just stood there panting heavily.
"I give up, man," Jon sighed, pulling out his phone. "I'm just gonna call the police and let them sort it out."
"Wait! What's dat in da sky?!" gasped Swizzle C, pointing upward.
"Hmph. You can't fool me, that's the oldest trick in the..." But Jon's voice trailed off as he saw an orange object zooming toward them out of the corner of his eye. "...book?"
Garfield landed so hard his ankles nearly snapped. "Nevah feahh! Da Caped Avenger iz heaahh!" he bellowed in a weird voice.
"Who da..." started a very perplexed Swizzle C.
Jon rolled his eyes. "Don't worry, it's just my cat, Garfield, being crazy again."
Using his super strength, Garfield the Caped Avenger started to push the two smashed-up cars apart so he could access Nermal. Except Garfield didn't have super strength, and his arms popped off his body like they were Mr. Potato Head limbs. So instead he kicked Jon's car up into the sky toward outer space. Jon was so pissed he couldn't see straight, and yelled out, "GAAAAARRRFIIIELD!"
"Hey, I guess all those years of kicking Odie actually paid off," remarked Garfield, using his mouth to insert one fallen arm back into its socket, and then using that arm to attach the other arm. "Now to rescue Nermal! The Caped Avenger... away!" He ran about two or three feet to the front grille of Swizzle's automobile, not really having to go that far. "Oh, there you are, Nermal... Nermal?" Peeling Nermal's body off, he noticed he didn't seem to be breathing. Garfield then checked for a pulse. There was none.
"Sheeiiiittt," Garfield shrugged.
...
Horns honked and beeped as traffic slowed to a standstill on southbound Indiana Hwy. 67, the jam starting from an accident at the Macedonia Avenue off-ramp and stretching all the way to Memorial Drive—
"Oh, my God, do you EVER shut the hell up?!" interrupted Garfield, putting his face in his hands. "Nermal's in critical condition here! We don't have time for your unnecessary details!"
sigh...
Anyway, Swizzle C was driving Jon, Garfield, and a still-unconscious Nermal to the vet's office, since Jon no longer had a car. Odie didn't come with them because he was off somewhere touching himself or something.
"Thanks again for driving us to the vet, Mr., uh..." said Jon.
The fat middle-aged black man chuckled. "Call me Swizzle. An' it's mah pleasure; it's da least I could do since you gun call the po-po on me after dis."
"I just hope we make it in time for our appointment." Jon looked in the back seat. "Garfield, are you still doing the chest compressions like I showed you?"
"Yep," answered Garfield, rhythmically sending blows to Nermal's chest with his fists. He turned to the camera. "Wow, they're letting me punch Nermal for a change! This is freaking awesome! Usually when I hit him I get screamed at!"
After a few minutes, traffic slowly began to clear up. "All right, we're moving again!" Jon exclaimed.
"Hell, yeaaah!" added Swizzle C, fist-pumping with both arms. However, after a few minutes of running full blast in the traffic jam, the old A/C unit in the car couldn't take anymore and gave out. "Ugh, dat thang always needs to be fixed."
"Eh, we'll just roll down the windows since we're moving," Jon said. So everyone rolled down their windows. Buuuut it turned out the traffic jam wasn't over after all and the car stopped once again. Wind stopping blowing into the car, and Garfield's fur quickly became matted with sweat again.
"Curse you, Jon Arbuckleeeeeeeeeee...!" he cried out skywardly.
...
Everyone was crowded around Nermal's limp body in the examination room at the Muncie Veterinary Clinic, just staring at him.
After a few minutes of nothing happening, Jon opened his big fat mouth. "Hey, Liz." He winked at her. "Wanna go over to my house and do some hanky-panky after this?" He then took off his shirt, revealing his hairy, flabby manboobs, and started twerking and dabbing unsexily all around the room in a failed attempt to turn Liz on, while going, "Unh. Unh. I'm simply ir-re-sis-ti-ble. Unh. Unh."
Liz cringed and managed to look away from Jon's disgusting body in time; however, the others weren't so lucky. "Oh, my Gooooooo..." Garfield started, before suddenly fainting and faceplanting on the floor. Swizzle C started barfing uncontrollably. Nermal, despite being nearly vegetative at this point, rolled over and grunted weakly with an unpleasant expression on his face.
Liz rooted around in a drawer until she found what she was looking for: a box of tranquilizer darts. "Nighty-night, Jon!" she laughed slightly, stabbing the dart into Jon's arm without even needing a tranquilizer gun.
"Unh, unh, I'm so sexy, unh— oh, nighty-night, Mommy. Can you tuck me in and bring me a glass of waaaaaaa..." Jon stumbled around for a few seconds and then collapsed.
...
Garfield regained consciousness a few minutes later, with puke splatters scattered all over him. He sat up woozily, rubbing his forehead. "Ohhhhh..." he moaned. "What happened?"
"Well, Garfield, I see you're up!" Liz observed aloud in a perky voice. She was writing something on her clipboard.
Looking around from the floor, Garfield couldn't help but notice that an oxygen-mask-clad Nermal had been hooked to several large machines during the time he was out. A rhythmic beeping noise now resonated throughout the room, which was previously silent. Jon and Swizzle C were standing next to each other on the other side of the table, staring solemnly at the gray kitten.
"Well, Garfield, I've got some good news and some bad news, and also some really bad news," stated Liz. "The good news is that Jon has promised to stop acting embarrassing. Jon, tell Garfield you're sorry."
"UuuuhhhhhhhI'msorry," Jon apologized insincerely.
"Da bad news is, we've hadta hook yo li'l friend here up on life support," continued Swizzle.
Garfield's eyes widened and the others waited for a moment to see how Garfield would react to this news.
"Life support?" Garfield chuckled. "THAT'S the 'bad' news? You know what? Just humor me. Tell me the really bad news!"
"Well, the really bad news is that Swizzle C threw up all over you after you fainted," Liz said, her eyes once again focused on her clipboard.
Garfield gasped loudly, putting his paws on his cheeks. "No...NOOOHOHOOO!" he screamed dramatically. He started speed-pacing while hyperventilating. "What am I gonna do? My fur is RUINED and it'll never come out ever and Odie'll make fun of me and thenoohhhh yeah I'm a cat." He skidded to a stop. "I can just clean MYSELF up." He started licking his fur clean, with no regards for the others in the room.
Swizzle C vomited once more.
...
Garfield was leaning over the table staring at Nermal, as the heart monitor beeped. And beeped. And beeped.
Bored, he began patting on the table in time with the heart monitor, then began drumming more complex rhythms while still being in sync with the beeping. Then he started beatboxing as well. Eventually, he started singing to himself in his head, "That's called bein' a cat! Lie around, get fat! That's what it takes to be a cat!"
"There's no use in keeping him alive anymore," said Liz to Swizzle and Jon with a heavy sigh. "I'm just going to pull the plug and let nature take its course." She sadly unhooked the life support, causing Nermal to flatline.
"You'll be sittin' pretty, kitty ca—" Garfield stopped drumming and beatboxing and looked annoyed. "Hey! Who turned my beat off?!"
Jon ran up and put his arm on his cat's shoulder. "Garfield, I'm..." He cleared his throat. "Well, I'm not quite sure how to t-tell you this..." He stammered for a long time, trying to find the right words.
Eventually Swizzle C had had enough of Jon's stuttering and hollered out, "NERMAL'S DEAD! OKAAAAAY?!"
After recovering from the initial startle, a very creeped out Garfield replied, "Dude, he's not dead. He's just not alive is all."
Liz, even though she lacked telepathy like everybody, noticed Garfield's face and body language and calmly told him, "We've done all we can do for him here, Garfield." She stifled a little sob. She hated seeing cute animals die. "I'm sorry, but we just can't keep him alive anymore."
"You still have Odie at home to play with," Jon smiled.
There was a long silence, then Garfield nodded his head blankly. He hated Odie with a burning passion. "Yeah, whatever. Forget Nermal. Let's get out of here." He turned toward the door.
"You know, I really didn't expect him to take it so well," whispered Jon to Liz.
"I know, it's weird! We should get him a family-sized Stouffer's lasagna for being so brave today," Liz whispered back.
"That sounds like a gre..."
Their conversation was interrupted by water filling the entire volume of the room and hitting the ceiling in half a second before draining by shooting out the windows and seeping out into the hall. When it was all drained, the two found that the source of the sudden flooding was from Garfield, who was kneeled on Nermal's table with him, wailing intensely and loudly. It was an ugly cry, the kind with wrinkles and giant tears that roll down your neck and under your shirt, even though Garfield never really wore shirts.
"Oh, Nermal! I'm so sorry!" sobbed the fat land barge, pounding his fist on the table. "I said all those mean things to you and made you die! What have I done? I've been such a fooooool!"
"Aw, dammit," Jon grumbled, rolling his eyes at seeing his cat being overly-dramatic again. He was always like this. For example, one time, Pooky needed to be put on to wash. Garfield had followed Jon into the laundry room, and was waving handkerchiefs and throwing confetti as if Pooky were boarding a cruise ship and he was watching from the docks. "You have no idea how much pressure I'm under," Jon had said on that day.
But this time was different. Jon couldn't help but feel sorry for the little guy as he watched him bitterly mourn the death of his old pal, Nermal. It didn't help that Jon had to make the dreaded phone call to his parents later about the passing of their cat.
As Garfield cried, he thought he heard Desireé Goyette's voice singing ever so sweetly:
"So long, old friend, I wish that I could see you once again... I never knew the time would come when I'd be losing you..."
Garfield looked up slowly, seeing a record player in the corner. He got off the table, ran up to it and smashed it as hard as he could.
"I hope you know I never—" "SHUT UUUPPPPP!" shrieked Garfield furiously.
He returned to Nermal and resumed his wild fit of sorrow. "There's no time for music! I just killed someone! Oh, WHY did I kick you out of my house, Nermal? Why did I make you suicidal? Come back, Nermal! Come back! I LOOOOOVE YOU!" He was absolutely crestfallen.
"Dude, chill. You're going practically nuts over me, and, to be honest, it's getting on my nerves a little," said Nermal, sitting upright.
Garfield was angry at this sudden turn of events. "What the hell's the matter with you?! You're supposed to be dead! Go back to being dead!" he sniveled, still heaving with sobs.
"I... am?" Nermal was puzzled. "Well, okay, then." He lied back down and closed his eyes, trying his best to re-die.
"Good. Now, where was I?" After a pause, Garfield burst into hysterical tears again for several minutes until his mind finally put two and two together. "Duh... wait a minute... NERMAL!" He embraced Nermal, whom he now considered to be a person he was okay with, and laughed in relief and overjoy as the last few tears rolled down his face. "Nermal! Nermal, Nermal, Nermal, Nermal, Nermal!" He repeated his name over and over rapidly as he squeezed him and cuddled him. "Oh, Nermal! I was so worried about you! You had no idea!"
"Actually, I did kind of... have an idea..." Nermal grunted, squirming against the weight of the overweight orange cat's hugs and hoping not to get sucked into his fat rolls.
"I don't understand it!" Liz gasped, shaking her head in disbelief. "He didn't die at all?!"
"I guess not," chuckled Jon. "Maybe he was just 'not alive' for a while, is all."
Liz expressed further flabbergast upon reading Nermal's oxygen and heart monitors. "On top of that, his vital signs are looking quite good for someone whose heart stopped for a few minutes."
"It's uh miiiracle!" Swizzle C cried, sounding like a black preacher. "Haaallelujah, baby!" He jumped in the air.
"That, or maybe Garfield's love for Nermal saved his life," Jon suggested. "We could solve so many problems in our society today if we were more loving to people."
"Yeah!" agreed Liz. "There would be less war, less fighting, less bigotry and prejudice against Arabs and asexuals."
"Speaking of love," said Jon to Swizzle C, "I'm going to do something loving to you and not call the police on you for wrecking my car and being rude to me earlier, as well as trying to shoot me."
"Wow, thanks! I wuz worried I wuz gon go ta jail."
Back to Garfield and Nermal.
"Daaaammn, what a sappy conversation!" Garfield whispered loudly to Nermal as they looked on. "Anyway..." They started hugging and stuff again. "Oh, Nermal! Nermal! I love you, Nermal! I love you! Oh, Nermal! Ohhh, I love you so much, I could just..."
There was no way anyone could predict what occurred after that. Garfield started to give Nermal little kisses all over his face. Nermal giggled because it tickled. At first he was kissing him innocently and platonically, but suddenly Garfield felt strange new feelings for Nermal and the kisses slowly grew hotter and more intense. Finally he couldn't take it anymore and grabbed Nermal's head, pulling it towards him while pressing his lips against his as dramatic yet romantic orchestral soap opera music played.
Initially, the smaller cat kicked and resisted, trying to escape, but actually began to like the feeling a little. When Garfield pulled back, he wanted more. So, Nermal pulled Garfield's head towards his own and they kissed once more, making little smooching sounds as they did. Then Nermal pushed his tongue between Garfield's lips. Garfield's eyes widened at Nermal's sudden enthusiasm, but realized that he loved the feeling of French kissing and began to squirm his own tongue around the inside of Nermal's mouth.
They wrapped their arms around each other, their tongues exploring their now-connected mouths. Each cat stared at the other through dreamy, half-lidded eyes as their tongues waltzed and tangoed, swirling around and wrapping around each other as the two made out. Their lips were moistened with each other's dripping salivation. It was the best feeling and they both felt tingly all over as they each savored the moment. Then Garfield decided to try something different. As they continued kissing, he lightly bit down on Nermal's tongue, causing him to yelp out in pain. And yet, it felt good, the pleasure being much stronger than the pain. In response, without stopping the kissing, Nermal bit down on Garfield's tongue hard, making him moan in pleasure. They continued making out as the other three just watched and stared with their jaws open wide.
"Nermal's a kitten, right?" Liz said to Jon with the most disgusted expression ever.
"How can a cat born in 1979 still be a kitten?" responded Jon. "He just looks like a kitten because he's so cute!"
"Good point." Liz wiped her brow. "Whew!"
"You... you know, this story's over 4,500 words long now..." Jon chuckled, blushing a deep pink.
"Yeah, dis iz makin' me sick ta mah stomach," whimpered Swizzle C.
"So, end the story?" Jon asked.
"HELL YEAH!" shouted the other two.
"Odie! Here, boy!" called Jon.
Odie skidded into the room, holding a sign that he had hand-painted himself. "Ruff, ruff!" he barked proudly, emphasizing and pointing to each word individually. "THE" "END."

Compiled List of Pan-Pagan Festivals for 2018 (Non-Exhaustive)

Summary of "What is your favorite jazz standard?"

Almost a day ago, /jazz was asked:
What is your favorite jazz standard?
I have summarized the results with a Wikipedia link and excerpt, YouTube search link, and the number of upvotes (at the time that I saved the page). Some of this was automated and some was edited by hand. Please let me know if you see anything strange or what can be improved upon. Results were limited by Reddit's 40,000 character per post limit.
Here are mathematical statistics about the first time a year is mentioned in each article and is presumably the year the song was composed.

mean: 1948.53
mode: 1959
median: 1947

On Green Dolphin Street | YouTube | Points: 166
"On Green Dolphin Street" (originally entitled "Green Dolphin Street") is a 1947 popular song composed by Bronisaw Kaper with lyrics by Ned Washington. The song was composed for the film Green Dolphin Street, which was based on a 1944 novel of the same name by Elizabeth Goudge, and became a jazz standard after it was recorded by Miles Davis in 1958.
In A Sentimental Mood | YouTube | Points: 92
"In a Sentimental Mood" is a jazz composition by Duke Ellington. He composed the piece in 1935 and recorded it with his orchestra during the same year. Lyrics were written Manny Kurtz; Ellington's manager Irving Mills gave himself a percentage of the publishing, so the song was credited to all three.
Autumn Leaves | YouTube | Points: 141
"Autumn Leaves" is a popular song and jazz standard composed by Joseph Kosma with lyrics by Jacques Prévert.
Kosma was a native of Hungary who was introduced to Prevert in Paris. They collaborated on the song "Les Feuilles mortes" ("The Dead Leaves") for the 1946 film Les portes de la nuit where it was sung by Irène Joachim. Kosma was influenced by a piece of ballet music, "Rendez-vous" written for Roland Petit, which was itself borrowed partially from "Poème d'octobre" by Jules Massenet. Johnny Mercer wrote English lyrics and gave it the title "Autumn Leaves". Paul McCartney controls the publishing rights through his company MPL Communications.
A Night In Tunisia | YouTube | Points: 141
"A Night in Tunisia"is a musical composition written by Dizzy Gillespie around 1941 while Gillespie was playing with the Benny Carter band. It has become a jazz standard.
It is also known as "Interlude", Gillespie called the tune "Interlude" and said "some genius decided to call it 'Night in Tunisia'". He said the tune was composed at the piano at Kelly's Stables in New York. He gave Frank Paparelli co-writer credit in compensation for some unrelated transcription work, but Paparelli had nothing to do with the song. "A Night in Tunisia" was one of the signature pieces of Gillespie's bebop big band, and he also played it with his small groups. In January 2004, The Recording Academy added the 1946 Victor recording by Gillespie to the Grammy Hall of Fame.
On the album A Night at Birdland Vol. 1, Art Blakey introduced his 1954 cover version with this statement: "At this time we'd like to play a tune [that] was written by the famous Dizzy Gillespie. I feel rather close to this tune because I was right there when he composed it in Texas on the bottom of a garbage can." The audience laughs, but Blakey responds, "Seriously." The liner notes say, "The Texas department of sanitation can take a low bow."
Good Bye Pork Pie Hat | YouTube | Points: 57
Lullaby Of Birdland | YouTube | Points: 49
"Lullaby of Birdland" is a 1952 popular song composed by George Shearing with lyrics by George David Weiss under the pseudonym "B. Y. Forster" to circumvent the rule that ASCAP and BMI were forbidden from collaborating. The song has become a jazz standard. The title refers to Charlie "Bird" Parker and the Birdland jazz club named after him.
Nardis | YouTube | Points: 97
"Nardis" is a composition by American jazz musician Miles Davis. It was written in 1958, during Davis's modal period, to be played by Cannonball Adderley for the album Portrait of Cannonball. The piece has come to be associated with pianist Bill Evans, who recorded it repeatedly.
Stardust | YouTube | Points: 43
"Stardust" is a popular song composed in 1927 by Hoagy Carmichael with lyrics added by Mitchell Parish in 1929. Carmichael recorded the song, originally titled "Star Dust", at the Gennett studio in Richmond, Indiana. The "song about a song about love", played in an idiosyncratic melody in medium tempo, became an American standard and is one of the most recorded songs of the 20th century with over 1,500 recordings. In 2004, Carmichael's 1927 recording of the song was one of 50 recordings chosen by the Library of Congress to be added to the National Recording Registry.
It Could Happen To You | YouTube | Points: 36
"It Could Happen to You" is a popular standard with music by Jimmy Van Heusen and lyrics by Johnny Burke. The song was written in 1943 and was introduced by Dorothy Lamour in the Paramount musical comedy film And the Angels Sing (1944).A recording by Jo Stafford made on December 13, 1943, was released by Capitol Records as catalog number 158. It reached the Billboard Best Seller chart on September 21, 1944, at number 10, its only week on the chart. Bing Crosby's recording for Decca Records, made on December 29, 1943. The Dexter Gordon composition "Fried Bananas" is based on the changes of "It Could Happen to You".
Round Midnight | YouTube | Points: 66
"'Round Midnight" (sometimes "'Round About Midnight") is a 1944 jazz standard by pianist Thelonious Monk. A version recorded by Monk's quintet was added to the Grammy Hall of Fame in 1993. It is the most recorded jazz standard composed by a jazz musician.
There Will Never Be Another You | YouTube | Points: 62
"There Will Never Be Another You" is a popular song with music by Harry Warren and lyrics by Mack Gordon that was written for the Twentieth Century Fox musical Iceland (1942) starring Sonja Henie and John Payne. The songs in the film featured Joan Merrill accompanied by Sammy Kaye and His Orchestra.
Blue In Green | YouTube | Points: 57
"Blue in Green" is the third tune on Miles Davis' 1959 album, Kind of Blue. One of two ballads on the LP (the other being "Flamenco Sketches"), the melody of "Blue in Green" is very modal, incorporating the presence of the Dorian, Mixolydian, and Lydian modes. This is the only song that Cannonball Adderley sits out.
Nature Boy | YouTube | Points: 25
"Nature Boy" is a song first recorded by American jazz singer Nat King Cole. It was released on March 29, 1948, as a single by Capitol Records, and later appeared on the album, The Nat King Cole Story. The song was written in 1947 by eden ahbez and is partly autobiographical. It is a tribute to ahbez's mentor Bill Pester, who had originally introduced him to Naturmensch and Lebensreform philosophies, which ahbez practiced. When Cole was performing in 1947 at the Lincoln Theater, ahbez wanted to present the song to him, but was ignored. He left the copy with Cole's valet, and from him the singer came to know of "Nature Boy". After receiving appreciation for his performance of the song, Cole wanted to record it but needed consent from the writer who he eventually found.
Someday My Prince Will Come | YouTube | Points: 28
"Someday My Prince Will Come" is a popular song from Walt Disney's 1937 animated movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. It was written by Larry Morey (lyrics) & Frank Churchill (music), and performed by Adriana Caselotti (Snow White's voice in the movie). It was also featured in the 1979 stage adaptation of the 1937 animated musical movie. In AFI's 100 Years/100 Songs, it was ranked the 19th greatest film song of all time.
Saga Of Harrison Crabfeathers | YouTube | Points: 23
Softly, As In A Morning Sunrise | YouTube | Points: 21
"Softly, as in a Morning Sunrise" is a song with music by Sigmund Romberg and Oscar Hammerstein II from the 1928 operetta The New Moon. One of the best-known numbers from the show, it is a song of bitterness and yearning for a lost love, sung in the show by Philippe (tenor), the best friend of the hero, Robert Mission (baritone).
The original song was composed as a tango, and features a dance as accompaniment to the choral reprise, but many versions of the song have changed the tempo completely (there have been many jazz renditions). What some may consider the most ludicrous version is the one featured in the 1940 film version of the operetta, in which it is actually sung as a cheerful ditty by Nelson Eddy while he shines his shoes, despite the melancholy nature of the song's lyric.
So What | YouTube | Points: 41
"So What" is the first track on the 1959 album Kind of Blue by American trumpeter Miles Davis.
It is one of the best known examples of modal jazz, set in the Dorian mode and consisting of 16 bars of D Dorian, followed by eight bars of E♭ Dorian and another eight of D Dorian.
The piano-and-bass introduction for the piece was written by Gil Evans for Bill Evans (no relation) and Paul Chambers on Kind of Blue. An orchestrated version by Gil Evans of this introduction is later to be found on a television broadcast given by Miles' first quintet (minus Cannonball Adderley who was ill that day) and the Gil Evans Orchestra; the orchestra gave the introduction, after which the quintet played the rest of "So What". The use of the double bass to play the main theme makes the piece unusual. This arrangement was later performed and recorded as part of the album Miles Davis at Carnegie Hall.
The Girl From Ipanema | YouTube | Points: 47
"Garota de Ipanema" ("The Girl from Ipanema") is a Brazilian bossa nova jazz song. It was a worldwide hit in the mid-1960s and won a Grammy for Record of the Year in 1965. It was written in 1962, with music by Antnio Carlos Jobim and Portuguese lyrics by Vinicius de Moraes. English lyrics were written later by Norman Gimbel.The first commercial recording was in 1962, by Pery Ribeiro. The 1964 single featuring Astrud Gilberto and Stan Getz became an international hit. This had been shortened from the version on the album Getz/Gilberto (recorded in March 1963, released March 1964) which had also included the Portuguese lyrics sung by Joo Gilberto. In the US, the single peaked at number five on the Billboard Hot 100, and went to number one for two weeks on the Easy Listening chart. Overseas it peaked at number 29 in the United Kingdom, and charted highly throughout the world.
Numerous recordings have been used in films, sometimes as an elevator music clich. It is believed to be the second most recorded pop song in history, after "Yesterday" by The Beatles. The song was inducted into the Latin Grammy Hall of Fame in 2001. In 2004, it was one of 50 recordings chosen that year by the Library of Congress to be added to the National Recording Registry. In 2009, the song was voted by the Brazilian edition of Rolling Stone as the 27th greatest Brazilian song.
Misty | YouTube | Points: 15
"Misty" is a jazz standard written in 1954 by pianist Erroll Garner. He composed it as an instrumental on the traditional 32-bar format and recorded it for the album Contrasts (1955). Lyrics were added later by Johnny Burke. It became the signature song of Johnny Mathis, appearing on his 1959 album Heavenly and reaching number 12 on the U.S. Pop Singles chart later that year. Country and pop singer Ray Stevens had a number 14 hit with his cover version of "Misty" in 1975 on the Billboard Hot 100. This version reached number two in the United Kingdom. The song has been recorded many times, including versions by Ella Fitzgerald, Aretha Franklin, Frank Sinatra, and Sarah Vaughan.
On The Sunny Side Of The Street | YouTube | Points: 14
For the Pogues song, see Sunny Side of the Street (song)"On the Sunny Side of the Street" is a 1930 song composed by Jimmy McHugh with lyrics by Dorothy Fields. Some authors say that Fats Waller was the composer, but he sold the rights to the song. It was introduced in the Broadway musical Lew Leslie's International Revue starring Harry Richman and Gertrude Lawrence.
Joy Spring | YouTube | Points: 15
"Joy Spring" is a jazz composition by Clifford Brown and is his signature song. The first recording was the one realized at Capitol Recording Studios, in Los Angeles in July 1954 (published posthumously in the 1988 Pacific Jazz Records's album Clifford Brown - Jazz Immortal CDP 7 46850 2 featuring Zoot Sims), the following month he created another version with Max Roach, published in the album Clifford Brown & Max Roach.
Brown composed the song in honor of his wife Larue Anderson, whom he called his "joy spring".
My Favorite Things | YouTube | Points: 13
"My Favorite Things" is a show tune from the 1959 Rodgers and Hammerstein musical The Sound of Music.
In the original Broadway production, this song was introduced by Mary Martin playing Maria and Patricia Neway playing Mother Abbess. Julie Andrews, who played Maria in the 1965 film version of the musical, had previously sung the song on the Christmas special for The Garry Moore Show.
Afro Blue | YouTube | Points: 14
"Afro Blue" is a jazz standard composed by Mongo Santamara, perhaps best known in its arrangement by John Coltrane.
Mongo Santamaria first recorded his composition "Afro Blue" in 1959, when playing with Cal Tjader's band, Cal Tjader Sextet. The first recorded performance of the piece, recorded live on April 20, 1959, at the Sunset Auditorium in Carmel, California, with composer Mongo Santamaría on percussion.
In 1960, lyrics were added by prolific songwriter Oscar Brown.
"Afro Blue" was the first jazz standard built upon a typical African 3:2 cross-rhythm, or hemiola. The song begins with the bass repeatedly playing 6 cross-beats per each measure of 12 8, or 6 cross-beats per 4 main beats—6:4 (two cells of 3:2). The following example shows the original ostinato "Afro Blue" bass line. The cross noteheads indicate the main beats (not bass notes).
In 1963, John Coltrane recorded "Afro Blue" with Elvin Jones on drums. Coltrane also added several chords, making his version more harmonically sophisticated than Santamaria's original version.
Lush Life | YouTube | Points: 13
"Lush Life" is a jazz standard that was written by Billy Strayhorn from 1933 to 1936. It was performed publicly for the first time by Strayhorn and vocalist Kay Davis with the Duke Ellington Orchestra at Carnegie Hall on November 13, 1948.
The lyrics describe the author's weariness of the night life after a failed romance, wasting time with "jazz and cocktails" at "come-what-may places" and in the company of girls with "sad and sullen gray faces/with distingué traces". Strayhorn was a teenager when he wrote most of the song, which was to become his signature composition (along with "Take the 'A' Train").
Birds Of Fire | YouTube | Points: 12
Birds of Fire is the second studio album by American jazz fusion band the Mahavishnu Orchestra. It was released on January 3, 1973 by Columbia Records and is the last studio album released by the original band line-up before it dissolved.
Skylark | YouTube | Points: 13
"Skylark" is an American popular song with lyrics by Johnny Mercer and music by Hoagy Carmichael, published in 1941. Carmichael wrote the melody, based on a Bix Beiderbecke cornet improvisation, as "Bix Licks," for a project to turn the novel Young Man With a Horn into a Broadway musical. After that project failed, Carmichael brought in Johnny Mercer to write lyrics for the song. Mercer said that he struggled for a year after he got the music from Carmichael before he could get the lyrics right. Mercer recalled that Carmichael initially called him several times about the lyrics but had forgotten about the song by the time Mercer finally wrote them. The yearning expressed in the lyrics was based on Mercer's longing for Judy Garland, with whom he had an affair.
This song is considered a jazz standard. Additionally, it is believed to have inspired a long-running Buick car of the same name that was produced from 1953 to 1998.
Fly Me To The Moon | YouTube | Points: 36
Fly Me to the Moon, originally titled In Other Words, is a song written in 1954 by Bart Howard.
Kaye Ballard made the first recording of the song the year it was written. Since then, it has become a frequently recorded jazz standard, often featured in popular culture. Frank Sinatra's 1964 version was closely associated with the Apollo missions to the Moon.
In 1999, the US-based Songwriters Hall of Fame honored Fly Me to the Moon by inducting it as a "Towering Song" which is an award "...presented each year to the creators of an individual song that has influenced our culture in a unique way over many years.
All The Things You Are | YouTube | Points: 9
"All the Things You Are" is a song composed by Jerome Kern with lyrics written by Oscar Hammerstein II.
The song was written for the musical Very Warm for May (1939) and was introduced by Hiram Sherman, Frances Mercer, Hollace Shaw, and Ralph Stuart. It appeared in the film Broadway Rhythm (1944).
Moanin' | YouTube | Points: 9
"Moanin'" is a composition by Bobby Timmons, first recorded by Art Blakey's band on the 1958 album of the same title.
All Of Me | YouTube | Points: 32
"All of Me" is a popular song and jazz standard written by Gerald Marks and Seymour Simons in 1931.
First performed by Belle Baker over the radio and recorded in December 1931 by Ruth Etting, it has become one of the most recorded songs of its era, with notable versions by Russ Columbo, Bing Crosby, Billie Holiday, Louis Armstrong, Mildred Bailey, Benny Goodman, Teddy Wilson in 1941, the Count Basie Orchestra, Harry James, Ella Fitzgerald, Sarah Vaughan (for the 1957 album, Swingin' Easy), Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra, Frankie Laine in 1947, Dinah Washington at the 1958 Newport Jazz Festival, Shirley Bassey in 1962, The Blue Diamonds, Della Reese, Johnnie Ray, Django Reinhardt, Erroll Garner, Willie Nelson, Ronnie Dove, Jean Frye Sidwell, João Gilberto (Disse Alguém), Michael Bublé, Miss Montreal in 2012 and The Rockin' Berries. Ani DiFranco sang the song in 2012 for the documentary, Love, Marilyn. It is also recorded by Eric Clapton on his 2013 album Old Sock with Paul McCartney.
The Very Thought Of You | YouTube | Points: 8
"The Very Thought of You" is a jazz and pop standard that was recorded and published in 1934 with music and lyrics by Ray Noble. The song was first recorded by Ray Noble and His Orchestra with Al Bowlly on vocals for HMV in England in April 1934. This record was then released in the United States by Victor. Noble re-recorded the song in 1941 for Columbia with vocals by Snooky Lanson. "The Very Thought of You" was used in the Barbara Stanwyck film A Lost Lady.
The song was the subject of litigation in 1962. In 1934 Noble assigned the copyright to British publisher Campbell, Connelly & Company. But before the copyright was renewed, Noble assigned the United States copyright to M. Witmark & Sons. Suit was brought by Campbell, Connelly against Noble, stating that the assignment covered all rights, including rights in the U.S. A British High Court judge ruled in favor of Campbell, Connelly.In Mitch Albom's best-selling book Tuesdays With Morrie, Mitch's wife, Janine, sings this song to Morrie Schwartz.
Tenderly | YouTube | Points: 9
"Tenderly" is a popular song published in 1946 with music by Walter Gross and lyrics by Jack Lawrence. Written in the key of Eb as a waltz in 3/4 time, it has since been performed in 4/4 and has become a popular jazz standard.
Sarah Vaughan recorded the song in 1946 and had a US pop hit with it in 1947.
Moonlight In Vermont | YouTube | Points: 9
"Moonlight in Vermont" is a popular song about the U.S. state of Vermont, written by John Blackburn (lyrics) and Karl Suessdorf (music) and published in 1944.The lyrics are unusual in that they do not rhyme. John Blackburn, the lyricist, has been quoted as saying, "After completing the first 12 bars of the lyric, I realized there was no rhyme and then said to Karl, 'Lets follow the pattern of no rhyme throughout the song. It seemed right.'" The lyrics are also unconventional in that each verse (not counting the bridge) is a haiku.The song is considered an unofficial state song of Vermont and is frequently played as the first dance song at Vermont wedding receptions. It was first introduced by Margaret Whiting in a 1944 recording, and has been covered by numerous other artists over the years. Stan Getz and Gerry Mulligan recorded it several times apiece.
My Funny Valentine | YouTube | Points: 11
"My Funny Valentine" is a show tune from the 1937 Richard Rodgers and Lorenz Hart musical Babes in Arms in which it was introduced by former child star Mitzi Green. The song became a popular jazz standard, appearing on over 1300 albums performed by over 600 artists. In 2015 it was announced that the Gerry Mulligan quartet featuring Chet Baker's version of the song was inducted into the Library of Congress's National Recording Registry for the song's "cultural, artistic and/or historical significance to American society and the nations audio legacy". Mulligan also recorded the song with his Concert Jazz Band in 1960.
Blue Bossa | YouTube | Points: 7
"Blue Bossa" is an instrumental jazz composition by Kenny Dorham. It was introduced on Joe Henderson's 1963 album Page One. A blend of hard bop and bossa nova, the tune was possibly influenced by Dorham's visit to the Rio de Janeiro Jazz Festival in 1961. The tune has since been recorded numerous times by different artists, making it a jazz standard.
Days Of Wine And Roses | YouTube | Points: 9
"Days of Wine and Roses" is a popular song, from the 1962 movie of the same name.
The music was written by Henry Mancini with lyrics by Johnny Mercer. They received the Academy Award for Best Original Song for their work. In 2004 it finished at #39 in AFI's 100 Years...100 Songs survey of top tunes in American cinema.
The song is composed of two sentences, one for each stanza and are each sung as 3 lines.
Nuages | YouTube | Points: 7
"Nuages" (French pronunciation: [na]) is one of the best-known compositions by Django Reinhardt. He recorded at least thirteen versions of the tune, which is a jazz standard and a mainstay of the gypsy swing repertoire. English and French lyrics have been added to the piece which was originally an instrumental work. The title translated into English is "Clouds", but the adaptation with English lyrics is titled "It's the Bluest Kind of Blues".
In 1940, Django made two recordings of Nuages in F major, and with a clarinet melody. (Some later recordings are in G major, perhaps to suit the violin.) Unhappy with the first recording, Reinhardt added a second clarinet, creating a renowned arrangement for the December 1940 recording. Reinhardt's 1946 recording (as can be heard in the sample) is in the key of G major. "Nuages" was released by Django Reinhardt and the Quintet of the Hot Club of France on the French Swing label as a single in 1940.
Summertime | YouTube | Points: 7
"Summertime" is an aria composed in 1934 by George Gershwin for the 1935 opera Porgy and Bess. The lyrics are by DuBose Heyward, the author of the novel Porgy on which the opera was based, although the song is also co-credited to Ira Gershwin by ASCAP.
The song soon became a popular and much recorded jazz standard, described as "without doubt ... one of the finest songs the composer ever wrote ... Gershwin's highly evocative writing brilliantly mixes elements of jazz and the song styles of blacks in the southeast United States from the early twentieth century". Composer and lyricist Stephen Sondheim has characterized Heyward's lyrics for "Summertime" as "the best lyrics in the musical theater".
Don't Get Around Much Anymore | YouTube | Points: 13
"Don't Get Around Much Anymore" is a jazz standard with music by Duke Ellington and lyrics by Bob Russell. The tune was originally called "Never No Lament" and was first recorded by Duke Ellington and His Famous Orchestra on May 4, 1940 as a big-band instrumental. Russell's lyrics were added in 1942.
Take Five | YouTube | Points: 45
"Take Five" is a jazz standard composed by Paul Desmond and originally recorded by the Dave Brubeck Quartet for its 1959 album Time Out. Made at Columbia Records' 30th Street Studio in New York City on July 1, 1959, fully two years later it became an unlikely hit and the biggest-selling jazz single ever. Revived since in numerous movie and television soundtracks, the piece still receives significant radio airplay.
Anthropology | YouTube | Points: 5
"Anthropology" (also known as "Thriving from a Riff" or "Thriving on a Riff") is a bebop-style jazz composition that is credited to Charlie Parker and Dizzy Gillespie. Parker stated in 1949 that Gillespie had played no part in its writing, and that others had added the trumpeter as co-composer.It is a contrafact, being based on the harmony of "I Got Rhythm". The first recording of the composition, then known as "Thriving from a Riff", was made on November 26, 1945, by an ensemble led by Parker. The other musicians were trumpeter Miles Davis, pianist Argonne Thornton, bassist Curley Russell, and drummer Max Roach.
Come Rain Or Come Shine | YouTube | Points: 5
"Come Rain or Come Shine" is a popular music song written by Harold Arlen, who composed the music, and Johnny Mercer, who wrote the lyrics. The song was written for the musical St. Louis Woman, which opened on March 30, 1946, and closed after 113 performances.It "became a modest hit during the show's run, making the pop charts with a Margaret Whiting (Paul Weston and His Orchestra) recording rising to number seventeen, and, shortly after, a Helen Forrest and Dick Haymes recording rising to number twenty-three."
Moon River | YouTube | Points: 5
"Moon River" is a song composed by Henry Mancini with lyrics by Johnny Mercer. It was originally performed by Audrey Hepburn in the 1961 movie Breakfast at Tiffany's, winning an Academy Award for Best Original Song. The song also won the 1962 Grammy Awards for Record of the Year and Song of the Year.The song has been covered by many other artists. It became the theme song for Andy Williams, who first recorded it in 1962 (and performed it at the Academy Awards ceremony that year). He sang the first eight bars of the song at the beginning of each episode of his eponymous television show and named his production company and venue in Branson, Missouri, after it; his autobiography is called "Moon River" and Me. Williams' version was never released as a single, but it charted as an LP track that he recorded for Columbia on a hit album of 1962, Moon River and Other Great Movie Themes.The song's success was responsible for relaunching Mercer's career as a songwriter, which had stalled in the mid-1950s because rock and roll had replaced jazz standards as the popular music of the time. The song's popularity is such that it has been used as a test sample in a study on people's memories of popular songs.Comments about the lyrics have noted that they are particularly reminiscent of Mercer's youth in the Southern United States and his longing to expand his horizons. Robert Wright wrote in The Atlantic Monthly, "This is a love sung to wanderlust. Or a romantic song in which the romantic partner is the idea of romance." An inlet near Savannah, Georgia, Johnny Mercer's hometown, was named Moon River in honor of him and this song.
Airegin | YouTube | Points: 3
"Airegin" is a jazz standard composed by American jazz saxophonist Sonny Rollins in 1954.
Song For My Father | YouTube | Points: 4
Song for My Father is a 1965 album by the Horace Silver Quintet, released on the Blue Note label in 1965. The album was inspired by a trip that Silver had made to Brazil. The cover artwork features a photograph of Silver's father, John Tavares Silver, to whom the title song was dedicated. "My mother was of Irish and Negro descent, my father of Portuguese origin," Silver recalls in the liner notes: "He was born on the island of Maio, one of the Cape Verde Islands."
Stompin At The Savoy | YouTube | Points: 3
"Stompin' at the Savoy" is a 1934 jazz standard composed by Edgar Sampson. It is named after the famed Harlem nightspot the Savoy Ballroom in New York City.
Although the song is credited to Benny Goodman, Chick Webb, Edgar Sampson, and Andy Razaf, it was written and arranged by Sampson, Webb's alto saxophonist. Both Webb and Goodman recorded it as an instrumental, Goodman's being the bigger hit. Lyrics were added by lyricist Andy Razaf.
Alice In Wonderland | YouTube | Points: 3
Alice in Wonderland is the theme song composed by Sammy Fain for the Walt Disney 1951 animated film Alice in Wonderland. It was performed by The Jud Conlon Chorus and The Mellomen. The lyrics were written by Bob Hilliard and was arranged by Harry Simeone for treble voices.
The song plays during the opening and end credits. Izumi Yukimura sang her own theme song for the Japanese release of the film. The "dreamy" song has become a jazz standard that has been performed by Bill Evans, Oscar Peterson, Dave Brubeck, and others.
Spain | YouTube | Points: 6
Spain is an instrumental jazz fusion composition by jazz pianist and composer Chick Corea. It is likely Corea's most recognized piece, and is considered a jazz standard.Spain was composed in 1971 and appeared in its original (and most well-known) rendition on the album Light as a Feather, with performances by Corea (Rhodes electric piano), Airto Moreira (drums), Flora Purim (vocals and percussion), Stanley Clarke (bass), and Joe Farrell (flute). It has been recorded in several versions, by Corea himself as well as by other artists, including a flamenco version by Paco de Lucia, Al Di Meola and John McLaughlin in the 1980s, and a progressive bluegrass version by Bela Fleck in 1979. More recently, Corea has performed it as a duo with Japanese pianist Hiromi Uehara.
Groovin' High | YouTube | Points: 2
"Groovin' High" is an influential 1945 song by jazz composer and trumpeter Dizzy Gillespie. The song was a bebop mainstay that became a jazz standard, one of Gillespie's best known hits, and, according to Bebop: The Music and Its Players author Thomas Owens, "the first famous bebop recording". The song is a complex musical arrangement based on the chord structure of the 1920 standard originally recorded by Paul Whiteman, "Whispering", with lyrics by John Schonberger and Richard Coburn (n Frank Reginald DeLong; 18861952) and music by Vincent Rose. The biography Dizzy characterizes the song as "a pleasant medium-tempo tune" that "demonstrates...[Gillespie's] skill in fashioning interesting textures using only six instruments".
Wave | YouTube | Points: 2
"Wave" (also known as "Vou Te Contar" in Portuguese) is a bossa nova song written by Antônio Carlos Jobim. Recorded as an instrumental on his 1967 album of the same name, its English lyrics were written by Jobim himself later that year.
The English lyrics were used on the November 11, 1969 recording by Frank Sinatra, on his 1970 album Sinatra & Company. The English lyrics were also used by Johnny Mathis in his 1970 Close to You album.
The song was voted by the Brazilian edition of Rolling Stone to be the 73rd greatest Brazilian song.
According to The Jazz Discography, it has been recorded nearly 500 times.
Mercy, Mercy, Mercy | YouTube | Points: 2
"Mercy, Mercy, Mercy" is a jazz song written by Joe Zawinul in 1966 for Julian "Cannonball" Adderley and his album Mercy, Mercy, Mercy! Live at 'The Club'. The song is the title track of the album and became a surprise hit. "Mercy, Mercy, Mercy" went to #2 on the Soul chart and #11 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.
Nica's Dream | YouTube | Points: 2
"Nica's Dream" is a jazz standard composed by Horace Silver, named for Pannonica de Koenigswarter. The song has been recorded by The Jazz Messengers as well as many other artists.
Thomas Owens describes the composition – "The trumpet melody, one of the great themes in jazz literature, is a 64-measure song in aaba form. The accompaniment for the a sections is in a Latin style based on [...] one of Silver's favorite patterns. In the bridge the accompaniment alternates between backbeat chordal punctuations and four-beat swing. During the solos the rhythm section maintains the same accompanimental textures, which both clarify the form and maintain the theme's original moods and textures."
Stella By Starlight | YouTube | Points: 2
"Stella by Starlight" is a popular song by Victor Young that was drawn from thematic material composed for the main title and soundtrack of the 1944 Paramount Pictures film, The Uninvited. Appearing in the film's underscore as well as in source music as an instrumental theme song without lyrics, it was turned over to Ned Washington, who wrote the lyrics for it in 1946. The title had to be incorporated into the lyrics, which resulted in its unusual placement: the phrase appears about three quarters of the way through the song, rather than at the beginning or the end.At one point in the film, the main character, Rick (Ray Milland) tells Stella (Gail Russell) that he is playing a serenade, "To Stella by Starlight".

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Try our popular year-round French Lick water park. Go fishing or water-skiing Patoka Lake and ride the French Lick Scenic Railway through the Hoosier National Forest. Or choose from the countless other outdoor things to do in French Lick, Indiana, including mountain biking, ATV tours, hiking, zip lining, horseback riding, golfing and much French Lick West Baden Museum, 469 S. Maple St, French Lick, IN 47432, Phone: 812-936-3592. You are reading "6 Best Things to Do in French Lick, Indiana" Back to Top. Things to do near me today, beaches with kids, romantic parks, unique places to visit in USA right now, hotels, tourist attractions: Sarasota, From Boston, OR, NC, From Houston Play to win at French Lick Casino, a 51,000-square-foot, single-level gaming venue with a ton of ways to cash in. Our main gaming floor boasts more than 1,000 new and classic slots and video poker, plus 37 live-dealer table games and a new sports book. With soaring 27-foot ceilings, French Lick’s non-smoking gaming room is the largest in the For many visitors, it happens at French Lick. French Lick may not be as popular as other cities in United States, but don’t let that fool you. French Lick is a smaller but beautiful upcoming tourist destination that is worth a visit. You will be surprised by some of the unique things to do and places you can explore at this hidden destination. French Lick Casino and The Valley Links Course are open to the public. Exciting events are bountiful at French Lick Resort all year long. Whether you’re in the mood for some live jazz, a stroll around property in a surrey bike, a romantic carriage ride or wanting to test your luck in the casino, we have you covered. Indiana; French Lick; Free & Cheap Activities; Free & Cheap Things to Do in French Lick, IN. The list below includes 28 free or cheap things to do in or near French Lick, Indiana, including 51 different types of inexpensive activities like Scenic Railroads, Movie Theaters, Art Gallery and History Museums. French Lick Winery has more than 30 wines available for tasting, ranging from dry to sweet to fortified and bubbly. There’s also a full-service Italian café and a gift shop with a variety of wine-related accessories and logo items, apparel, and gourmet foods including locally made artisan cheeses, pretzels and cookies. Visiting French Lick, IN, and want the scoop on some fun spots to visit when you go? From scenic boat rides to animal encounters, here are my picks for fun things to do in French Lick with kids. Disclosure: I was graciously hosted by the folks at Visit French Lick West Baden to give you the scoop on what to see and do when you visit. Things to Do in French Lick, Indiana: See Tripadvisor's 10,397 traveler reviews and photos of French Lick tourist attractions. Find what to do today, this weekend, or in February. We have reviews of the best places to see in French Lick. Visit top-rated & must-see attractions. 8594 W. State Road 56, Box 150, French Lick, IN 47432, Phone: 800-748-7246. You are reading "23 Best Things to Do in Southern Indiana" Back to Top or Amazing things to do around me & More pictures of fun cheap vacation spots

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D100 Interesting Weird War II Events and Plot Hooks, Take 3